Midlife in Hell

Name: Midlife in Hell
Author: J.B. Trepagnier

53 pages

You know those YA books we still love where some plucky teenager finds out they are the chosen one with magical powers and has to save a realm?

Someone f*cked up. Someone fucked up badly. My second husband just left me for his TA and I just had a hot flash so bad, the roof of my house blew off. I honestly thought it was just spontaneous human combustion, but then three demons appeared in my bathroom and they apparently don’t like it when you squirt shampoo in their eyes because you can’t reach the towel.

So, yes, it was a hot flash, but it was also demon puberty because my dad is Lucifer. That explains why Mom never talked about him. Apparently, I’m not the antichrist, but I am heir to the throne of Hell. Lucifer is missing and Hell needs a Morningstar or it malfunctions. All those reports about a dangerous new street drug were actually souls escaping Hell and plonking themselves in the freshest dead body they could find. Someone should have told me there were zombies.

So, yeah, me and my hot flashes have to go to a realm known for being a fiery inferno to stop the zombies from invading Earth and probably locate the devil because I have no idea what I’m doing.

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