Page 88 of The Bitter Words

Adrenaline shoots through me. On one hand, that’s all I want, but if she’s here with me, she’s likely to figure out what’s going on with me.

I shift and swallow. “How do you see that playing out?”

“I don’t know. What do you want?”

“Obviously, I want you with me, but there’s no way I can pay for you to travel with us all the time.”

“I don’t want that.” Her cheeks turn red. “I’m starting my own fashion line and I need to focus on getting it off the ground. But I’ll get to make my own schedule.”

A smile grows across my face. “So you’re finally gonna do what you wanna do?”

“Yes. I’m ready.” She presses her lips together with her eyes sparkling brighter than they have since she’s been here.

“So how are you gonna get funding?”

“I have money saved up from the show and I’ll get residuals from both the reruns and the licensing from The Ember line. Callum, I can make this succeed. I know I can.”

“Lily, I have no doubt you will.” I squeeze her hand. “Tell me about your idea. How’s it gonna work?”

“I’m naming it Livianna Grace Designs. I’m thinking it will be an edgy, high-end clothing, lingerie, and accessories line. If that does well, maybe even grow it into perfumes, cosmetics, and handbags.”

“Don’t forget shoes.”

“Of course not! Shoes are a must.” She laughs and continues to go on for the next hour about her dreams.

It reminds me of how I felt when I wanted Mayhem to come together. My chest swells for her and I sit back in awe of her aspirations.

She’s eighteen and going for everything she wants with no safety net. And even bigger than that, she did it without getting her parents’ approval.

She gets up and starts getting ready for bed. “I want to incorporate the white and black lilies into the monogram. I’m not sure how I want it to look, but I know it’s going to evolve into something perfect.”

“It’s gonna be life-changing, Lily.” I pull off my boots and remember my grand gesture. “We should get to bed nowbecause I have a surprise for you. It’s gonna take a while. We’ll need to get up early to make sure I’m back in time for the concert tomorrow night.”

“What’s my surprise?” She disappears into the bathroom and comes out brushing her teeth.

I take my turn getting my toothbrush ready. “I’m not telling you because it’s your birthday present.”

She drops the subject after that. We finish preparing for bed and I make love to her, feeling better than I have in ages.

And the best part about it is I only had one drink and no drugs all night. I forgot how good it is to be sober.

We fall asleep a little before two-thirty in the morning, tangled up in the sheets and curled around each other. This is what heaven is all about.

“Don’t touch me!” I shoot up with sweat dripping off me and shaking. “Stop!”

“Callum, it’s okay.” Livianna sits on her knees. “It’s just me. It’s Livianna. I was just snuggling up to you. I’m sorry if I scared you.”

My wild eyes scan her silhouette. I can’t be sure if it’s really her. I smack the light switch on the wall next to the bed and the room illuminates.

Her face is set in deep lines of concern and apologies. “I’m sorry, but I think you were having a nightmare.”

“Yeah, I was.” My heart pounds hard as I try to catch my breath. “But you being here is helping me calm down.”

“What were you dreaming about?”

Was it a dream or some kind of fucked-up memory?

“I can’t really remember.” Once again, I lie. “Will you let me hold you while we try to go back to sleep?”