Page 143 of The Devil of Downtown

“And it didn’t stop anything. I still loved you. And I hated myself for it.”

His thumb digs into my palm before easing.

“I never dealt with the guilt properly,” he says. “So it sat there under everything. Every time I looked at you. I knew I wanted you more than I’d ever wanted anyone. And it felt like a betrayal.”

My chest tightens, the ache spreading somewhere deeper than my ribs.

“She died loving me,” he says quietly, as if each word costs him. “And one day I’ll die loving you. I think some part of medecided that if I pushed you away first, I could outrun that. And when things started to spiral, I did the one thing I’m good at.”

He swallows.

“I shut it down. I shut you out.”

His voice roughens. “I should have protected you. Instead, I left you alone and exposed. I’m sorry.”

I lift my hand, brushing my thumb along his jaw, feeling the tension there.

“I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” I say. “I was trying to believe people can still do the right thing, even when they’re broken.”

His fingers tighten around mine.

“I don’t want a life that doesn’t include you,” he says.

“If you’re willing,” he adds, “I want to stop running.”

Tears burn my eyes, but I blink them away; a stray one finding its way down my cheek.

“Come with me,” he says after a moment, his knuckles brushing the tear away. “To the Catskills. Just for a while. Let me take care of you.”

I study him. Searching for any sign that I can’t trust my instincts.

Before I can answer, the door opens and Sloane steps in with Elsie at her side, both of them stopping short when they see I’m awake, like they’re afraid I might disappear if they move too fast.

Sloane doesn’t hesitate.

The moment she sees me, she crosses the room and pulls me into a careful hug, arms firm but mindful, like she’s holding something fragile she refuses to drop. I feel her shake before I hear her sniff.

“You scared the hell out of me,” she murmurs into my hair.

“I know,” I whisper. “I’m sorry.”

She pulls back to look at my face, eyes shining, then smooths my hair away from my forehead the way she used to when we were kids. “Don’t. Just... don’t.”

Elsie hangs back for a second, suddenly shy, and then Sloane straightens, swiping at her cheeks. “I spoke to the head nurse,” she says, all business now, like that’s how she keeps herself together. “They’re happy for you to go today. I brought your clothes, nothing tight that will hurt you.”

“You always think of everything,” I say, smiling.

Sloane follows my gaze as it drifts past her to where Dane is standing near the window, and when I look back at her, something unspoken passes between us. A silent blessing.

“I’m going home with Dane,” I say, voice gentle but clear.

His eyes lift to mine, his mouth curving, some of his tension melting away, and it’s an effort to drag my gaze away.

There’s another pause before Sloane nods.

“Okay,” she says, her eyes communicating that she’s happy for me.

Only then do I notice Elsie standing suspiciously close to Dane, hands folded in front of her, head tipped at an angle that is unmistakablycoy.