Page 61 of Rayzor: Tell Me It’s Mine II

“Courtland, it’s over. You proved your point.”

“I still need that number off you.”

“You might not need it.” He opened the door. “He acts like he knows you anyway.” He walked into the house.

My eyes went to Ma. She didn’t look too surprised to hear that. In fact, she looked like she wanted to fucking cry.

Just as I was about to ask her about it, she tried scurrying off behind Maleek. I rushed to grab her.

“Who the fuck is he talking about?”

She glared down at her arm, then back up at me. “I don’t know but let go of me.”

That soft, trembling, scared voice she had was gone. It’s like she snapped back into her ways.

“You didn’t look like you were about to cry for nothing. You called. So, you know who the fuck he’s hanging with. Who is it?”

“You came and fixed the problem; don’t go starting new troubles. I just want to save Maleek.”

“You’re talking like he already can’t be saved.”

“He can always be saved if he wants to, but not if this is the path he’s choosing. I tried with you around this same age, and we see how that turned out.”

“My fucking daddy had just died. You think I was supposed to be around here singing hymns like you were?”

“What?” she asked as if a shock was sent through her system.

“When daddy died, I barely saw tears from you. You cried in silence, but I didn’t see that pain. You saw my pain every fucking day, Ma. But you, you walked around this mothafucka like God was about to fix it.”

“I had to keep going. I had kids to raise.”

“You raised one. You forgot about the other one.”

“Yeah, well it was hard to look at you after that.”

“Why? Because I wasn’t the son you brought into this world.”

“Look. I don’t have time for this. Thank you for coming by, but I have to go.”

I stood back and watched her leave like she always did. And the only thing I was left with to do was drop that shit just as I picked it up. It’s been the story of our relationship that had already ended.

I grabbed my shit, hopped inside my truck and dipped.

* * *

I arrived at the crib irritated that I had to take that shit there with Maleek. Instead of getting out of the truck, I stayed inside and rested my head back. I lifted my hand, tracing the marks and peeled skin on my knuckles.

It was some shit that Ma wasn’t telling me, and it’s more to the story than she’s telling. Maleek was now tied in her shit, but I can’t figure out how. I’ve now been told twice about a mothafucka in their lives who knew about me. I wasn’t looking hard enough because whoever it was was closer than I realized.

Eris walked out of the house in a long, black sundress. That rock on her hand glistened under the sun. She looked fucking beautiful as my wife.

She opened the driver’s door.

“I knew I heard you out here,” she said.

I held my hand out to help her up inside. I let the seat back so she could comfortably straddle my lap.

“How you doing, Mrs. Kirkland?” I smirked at her.