Page 113 of The Blessing

This day will be awkward as hell. I can’t believe I allowed Ronnie to talk me into this whole “family time” thing. Who knew it would be so fucking frightening? My Thanksgiving is going to consist of a “small”—Ronnie’s words, not mine—get-together consisting of: my dad and mom, Ronnie’s dad, Eden, Quinton, and their daughter, Harper. I wish it could just be Ronnie, Grey, and I. That’d make things a hell of a lot easier.

“You ready to get out, buddy?” I ask, turning Grey around to face me.

“No!”

“Of course not.” I snort. “It’s time to get out, buddy. We’ve got to get ready and help Mommy.”

“Dada,” he responds, giving my hand a little kiss.

I kiss his forehead, then reach down to pull the plug and get out of the tub. Grey’s shivering now that we’re out of the water, so I wrap him in a towel before making my way to his room to get him dressed. I hear a gasp as I make my way down the hallway to his room and turn to see Ronnie. Her face is covered in flour, but I can still see the deep blush that stains her cheeks. It’s only then, that I realize I’m naked and dripping wet.

“What’s up, babe?” I casually ask, trying hard not to smirk.

Ronnie’s gaze trails from my toes up my body, until she finally reaches my eyes. Her blush deepens, and she smiles as she says, “Can you run to the store for me? I know it’s going to be packed, but I ran out of vegetable shortening and eggs.”

“That’s fine, babe. I’ll go,” I answer with a shrug.

Standing in line at the grocery store would be a hell of a lot better than sitting around here—letting my nerves get the best of me. It’s also nice to know I’m making my girl happy. Her face lights up at my answer as she skips over to me, kissing me full on the mouth before backing away to give Grey’s cheek a kiss, as well.

“You’re a lifesaver. No rush… but you might want to head out now. I’m sure it’ll be packed and the lines will be pretty long. I still have to finish my pecan pie.”

I roll my eyes and throw her a smile. “Let me get my pants on first. I’m sure I’d give someone a heart attack if I left the apartment like this.”

I throw on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt before getting Grey dressed in the outfit I laid out for him the night before. It’s a nice blue polo and a pair of jeans. I wanted him to look nice, but I didn’t want to dress him too nice because I knew he’d be messy as fuck by the end of the day. Besides, when kids are dressed too nice, it gives me the creeps. It’s like they’re sending off some serious Children of the Corn vibes. After I have us both ready, I grab my keys, kiss my girl goodbye, and head to the store like the perfect hubby-to-be I am.

Traffic is fucking crazy on the way. I know it’s the busiest day of the year for traveling, but Jesus; I thought they would’ve gotten to where they’re going by now. I try not to get too aggravated because I know I’ve got a long day ahead of me. When I finally reach Safeway, the parking lot is just as packed as the highway was. I take a deep breath and imagine how nice a cigarette would be at a time like this. Fuck, I can taste the tobacco on my tongue right now! I hit my head against the steering wheel in frustration before getting out of the car. I’m happy to see Grey is blissful and carefree as I unbuckle him from his car seat. I wish I could be as content, but my life experiences seemed to have made me jaded. At least I’m not as jaded as I once was. Before Grey and Ronnie, I didn’t give a single fuck about anything and found everything in life to be pointless and trivial. Now, everything is so different I barely recognize it—and I especially don’t recognize myself. I’m such a changed fucking man, apparently.

This thought lifts my spirits as I walk toward the grocery store with Grey strapped to my chest in a baby sling. I’ll get through today, and regardless of whether Ronnie’s dad likes me or not, I know everything will be fine. My life is finally moving in a good direction and nothing will change that.

I practically run right into a frantic shopper as soon as I walk through the automatic doors. He looks just as fucking flustered as I feel as he brushes past me with his groceries. I pull out the list I jotted down and try to decipher my shit handwriting as I begin to make my way through the store. The baking aisle is, of course, fucking shit wrecked. There’s a few older women surrounding the flour and sugar, making it difficult for me to get around them carrying a baby in one arm and a basket in the other. Shouldn’t they be prepared for this? Isn’t this what old people live for? When I finally do get around their carts, I practically run into a woman who looks way too happy to see me. I can’t help but notice her tit job. They’re so pointy they look like they could poke a fucking eye out. I then look to her unintentionally—I’m sure that wasn’t the “look” she was going for—expressionless face before giving her a tight smile and moving past her.

“That’s such a cute baby,” she comments with an inviting smile. “How old is he?”

Sometimes, I genuinely wonder if women are actually interested in babies when they mention them, or if it’s just a way to talk to the dad. I used to tell myself: perhaps they do actually find Grey cute. It wouldn’t be hard to imagine. He is the cutest baby I’ve ever seen. Although, my opinion is rather biased. However, I find it hard to believe they’re very interested in him when their eyes are glued to me. I just don’t get this behavior at all. Doesn’t a baby indicate that I’m in a committed relationship? Or at least hint to that idea? I know single dads exist; I also know I’m not wearing a wedding band or anything like that, but I feel like I give off the “I’m taken”vibe. If that’s even a thing.

“Thanks,” I finally reply, not bothering with the pretense of coming off too friendly. “He’s ten months.”

“That’s wonderful,” she coos. “So, are you doing some last-minute shopping?”

What the fuck does it look like I’m doing? “Yep. Just picking up a few things. My fiancée is at home baking,” I say dismissively before I begin to continue down the aisle.

“I could help you find what you need,” she quickly replies, not letting our conversation come to an end like I hoped it would.

I feel bad for her. Maybe she really can’t take a hint. I guess she’s hot in that MILF sort of way, but I’m not buying what she’s selling. If it were a few years ago… I would’ve been more than happy to take her up on her sleazy offer. But now that I’ve got Ronnie, everyone else is shit in comparison.

“I’m fine, thanks. Nice meeting you,” I awkwardly say before attempting to move down the aisle again.

“Brenda,” she calls out.

I look over my shoulder and give her an uncomfortable smile before walking away. Why does this always seem to happen to me? I’m happy the rest of the women in the aisle are old enough to be my grandmother and are too busy actually shopping to pay me any attention. I find the items on my grocery list in peace. Or at least, as peaceful as one can be in an obnoxiously crowded store. I manage to grab the last carton of eggs the store has before I bolt toward the checkout. As I turn the corner on the way to the self-checkouts, I run into another shopper and dropping my basket, cringing as I hear it crash onto the floor.

“Fuck!” I groan in exasperation as I see the state of the only carton of fucking eggs I managed to find. I guess I’ll have to get that fucking vegan shit, after all.

“Sorry, man.”

I recognize that voice. I look up to see Travis standing in front of me with an apologetic look on his face. Grey cries, probably because he senses my annoyance, and I suddenly feel terrible that I’ve upset him. Damn, I need to stop cursing in front of him. I don’t want him to be sounding like me by the time he’s three years old. I rub his back and kiss his temple; he instantly calms down.

“Sorry, Trevor. I guess I didn’t see you.”