Page 43 of Home Ice

“Well, when you figure out whose business it is to tell me, you let me know.” My hands ball into fists where they’re still hidden from her view. “Don’t worry, you’ve got time. I’m here for the rest of summer.”

For the first time since I sat down, worry creases the corners of her eyes. “Your parents said you were leaving Wednesday.”

“Changed my mind.”

“Why?”

It takes all of my self-control to unfold my arms and relax back into my chair like this conversation doesn’t have me rattled. “Because it’s going to take me more than a few days to get to know my son.”

She exhales loudly, grips the coffee mug, and releases it again. “It’s going to take longer than a summer for that.”

“Well, we can deal with that when it comes to it.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

My gut is rioting violently at saying the words, but then I remember Kasen and why I’m doing this and that Barrett is just outside. I swallow loudly, and as I look across at the panic in her eyes, I can sympathize. I really can. “I’m not going to give up custody.”

There’s a long, thick silence that builds as we stare across at each other. “So what …” She blinks rapidly. “You’re going to take him away from me too?”

“I …” I break eye contact. “All I know is that I can’t walk away from my son. I can’t go back to my life and pretend like I don’t know about him. I want to know about him. I want to get that chance to hang out and talk and not have everything be so fucking complicated.”

Amelia’s hands are shaking, and she tucks them under the table like she doesn’t want me to see. “I’m not going to let you take him.”

“Amelia—”

“No. I have been here his entire life. I helped raise him. I’ve been here for every damn moment. All the good and the bad. He’s my fucking grandson.”

I’m trying so hard not to let her words get to me. I fail. “Well, thanks to you and your daughter, I didn’t get to be here for any of it. And that changes right goddamn now.”

With that, I shove away from the table, done with this conversation. She doesn’t try to stop me, and I don’t turn back either. I didn’t want to start a fight with her, but I hate that I’m feeling sorry for her. I hate that I understand her panic over losing Kasen. But I really fucking hate that she doesn’t understand mine.

I don’t want to take him away from her, and in some magical world, we’d find a way where we both get to be in his life, but with me under contract with St. Louis for another three years and her whole life here, one of us will have to give.

I’m ready to explode when I get back to the car.

“Can you believe this fucking shit?”

Barrett watches me. “Something tells me that it didn’t go well.”

“She all but demanded I take the car back and be the bad guy about it, and she said that she’s not going to let me take Kasen from her. Let me. Like she has more rights to him than his own fucking father.”

He doesn’t answer me, and it only riles me up more.

“I could take him, you know? I could do it. I have the money to hire lawyers she’d never be able to face. Then where the fuck would she be? No Carly, no Kasen, and—” My voice breaks.

“Is that what you want?” he whispers in the lingering gully left by my words.

I bury my face in my hands, anger and frustration so hard to fight. “No. I don’t want that at all.”

“Right.” He climbs out of the car. “Give me a second.”

Barrett is gone before I can stop him, and I sit there in shock for the whole five minutes it takes for him to get back. The second I spot him through the windshield, I try to pick out any signs of tension, but his casual, measured strides are the same as ever.

He climbs inside and turns on the car, not saying a word.

“Well?”

His lips twitch. “People tend to be very reasonable when you don’t shout in their face.”