Page 67 of Cakewalk

Gigi looked back over to Officer Nelligan in time to watch him step away from the door and be replaced by a tall, dark, bearded figure. His piercing blue eyes caught hers right away, but it was his muscular arms crossed in front of his strong chest that called to her the most. Her entire body cried out as she saw him appear in the doorframe, fighting the urge to run to him and lose herself in his embrace.

Holden.

29

Holden

The sight of Gigi sitting on that metal bench, curled up like a frightened kitten, was like a punch to Holden’s gut. His stomach lurched as he watched her swallow hard, taking him in, like she wasn’t sure if she should reach for him or cower even more. Gone was the vibrant woman he’d come to know over the past few weeks. In her place was the reserved, apprehensive one who had moved into his carriage house. He hated himself for having a part in her transformation back to this state. This was not who she was, and seeing her like this hurt more than any lie ever could.

“Holden,” Gigi said, her voice just above a whisper. The sound of it stole all the air from his lungs. She looked at him nervously, as if she still had no idea why he was here and what he was about to say. She doubted him—and after his reaction this morning, how could he blame her? His actions didn’t reflect how he felt about her, and now they were both left facing the consequences.

“Gigi,” he said, his own voice coming out rougher than he intended. Clearing his throat, he started again, wanting to make sure he got this right. “Gigi, I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t kill him,” she sobbed, tears springing to her eyes.

“I know, I know,” he said, rushing over to her. Kneeling down in front of her, he placed his hands on her hips and slid her toward him, until her feet were at the edge of the bench. The bench was low enough to the ground that with their difference in height they were almost face to face. He wanted nothing more than to wrap himself around her right now, but he had no idea how she’d react, so he settled for keeping his hands firmly on her hips, giving them a light squeeze to let her know he was there. “And not just because I talked to Detective Ball on my way in. I know deep down you didn’t kill him. That you didn’t do any of this. That there isn’t a single part of you that could ever even think of doing this.”

“I was going to tell you about Bradley, I promise. I didn’t mean to lie, at least not for as long as I did. I…I just needed to get away. And it seemed easier to tell people he was dead. I thought that people wouldn’t ask questions that way. But then I met you…” she trailed off, her emotions overtaking her. Her body shook as she continued to cry, those gray eyes holding him captive.

He felt his heart squeeze as another wave of guilt washed over him. Caulfield’s words rang through his mind again. Would your reaction be the same? Holden knew exactly what he should have done this morning, and now was the time to prove to Gigi that he was the man she deserved.

“Sweetheart, it’s okay. I get it. You were trying to protect yourself. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was wrong. I shouldn’t have reacted the way that I did this morning. I should have defended you, made sure you knew you were safe with me.”

“But you were right! I should have told you! It’s not that I don’t trust you, because I do. I trust you more than anyone else in the world.”

“I know you do, sweetheart,” he said, pulling her closer so their foreheads touched. As much as he loved hearing her tell him that she trusted him, he needed to find the words to tell her he felt the same and to apologize for not being that man when the moment came. “But I failed you. When the time came to be the man you need, the man you deserve, I wasn’t there. At least not in the way I should have been. You’ve spent so long being told you’re not important and that you’re not a priority. But none of that is true. You are important, and smart…and you are a priority. You’re my priority. All of you. Your safety, your happiness, and that wonderful mind of yours that keeps coming up with all these new ideas. I am so sorry that I didn’t do what I should have.”

“Holden,” she choked out.

“I can’t tell you how many times I thought to myself that it was a good thing that Bradley was dead, because if he’d been alive, I’d tear him limb from limb for what he did to you. For all those lies he told you. So maybe it was a good thing you didn’t tell me, because then I’d be the one in this jail and not the least bit sorry about it.”

Gigi let out a small giggle through her tears, and just that little bit made his insides come alive again. Taking that as his cue, he moved up onto the bench and hauled her into his lap. Pulling her as close as he could get her, he drew in a deep breath when she wrapped both her arms and legs around him, holding on tight. He squeezed her hard, not caring who might walk in and see them. Right now he only cared about making sure Gigi felt safe, secure, and most of all, loved.

“Gigi, you pulled me out of a darkness so consuming that I had resigned myself to never ever escaping. You helped inspire me and guide me back to my love of writing. You light up my life in ways I never could have imagined and that a few months ago I would have told you were impossible. You might have been running for your life, but you saved mine in the process.”

Kissing her softly, Holden’s insides lit up as she wiggled in his lap, returning his kiss. Their lips moved together in sync, tenderly expressing everything they were feeling. She felt so good in his arms, like this is where she belonged. It felt like it had been days since they touched, instead of just hours ago.

"Sweetheart, you waltzed right into my life, turned it upside down in all the best ways, and I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Well, you wouldn’t have had to renovate your carriage house, for one,” she said, trying to make a joke.

“As far as I’m concerned, you setting the place on fire was one of the best things that could have ever happened to me. It was the catalyst I needed. It brought us together and set this whole beautiful story in motion,” he told her, wanting to make sure she believed it. “You asked if you could borrow my muse, and I made a joke about not sharing, but that’s not the real reason. Gigi, you are my muse.”

“I am?” she asked, pulling back, a look of surprise covering her face.

“Yes, sweetheart, you are. You are the one who got the wheels turning in my head again. It started that day with the fire, but it continued every day after that with your smiles and your laughter. Your determination to learn new things and find your own way. Watching you be so hell-bent on figuring out your way around the kitchen was inspiring. Once you got going, you weren’t going to give up, and I knew that in order to be worthy of you, I couldn’t either.”

“I love you, Holden.”

“I love you, Gigi.”

* * *

Gigi

Gigi tightened her arms around Holden’s neck, nuzzling her face into his shoulder. She couldn’t believe just how amazing his touch felt. Moments ago she’d been so sure that this was something she’d never feel again—that the only words she’d ever hear come from his mouth were words of anger. Now, hearing him tell her he loved her, still after all this, was music to her ears.

“I was going to tell you today. I didn’t want it to be a secret any longer,” she said, fighting back a new round of tears. “I want us to have a future together. I want to read by the fire together and listen to you laugh because I haven’t seen some movie. I want to be the first person to read your books, and to travel with you as you tour the country so I can brag about what an amazing author you are. I want to force you to try all my new cupcake recipes and for you to have to lie to me to tell me they’re wonderful even when they aren’t. I want snow days and trips to the beach. We can skip Thanksgiving, but Christmases with your family are nonnegotiable.”