Page 46 of April’s Fool

“We’ve all talked and decided you don’t belong here,” she snaps, crossing her arms. “You need to just get your things and go back where you came from.”

“Really,” I draw out. “I’m glad you think your vote matters.”

“It does matter because we all know you don’t belong.”

I laugh at her matter-of-fact tone and shake my head. “Right, you keep thinking that all you want.”

I try to move past them, only for Venus to step back into my path. “Fool would be better off without you here. I know because he told me so after I sucked him off this morning.”

Her words sting, even though I know they’re not true. He wouldn’t do that to me.

“He told me how you couldn’t even do that right. That you were so inexperienced it wasn’t satisfying for him.” She gets this smug grin as she steps into my space. “So, you should just do us all a favor and get out of here before you end up getting hurt. Because I did warn you. I’d have his cock again, and I have.”

“We all did,” one of the other tramps pipes in.

Shaking my head, I push past them, refusing to believe them for even a minute. But a part of me can’t help but doubt myself. Could I not be enough for him? Could I satisfy him the way they claim?

Sure, we’ve had sex every day, but I’ve also been busy cramming in hours of studying for my finals. Maybe I haven’t been able to give him what he needs.

I try not to think about it as I head up the stairs to Fool’s room. My hand freezes on the doorknob when I hear moans from the other side of the door. What the hell?

I back away, jerking my hand back like it’s been burned. Staring at the door as the moans grow louder, I feel my heart breaking.

Samuel’s words echo in my head.

Venus’s join them.

I’m not enough.

My eyes burn as I keep tears at bay. I refuse to go in there and confront him. I’m not about to go back through the main room. But I need to get out of here. I need to get my head on straight before I face anyone, including Kayla. She’ll know something’s wrong immediately.

Heading for the back of the hall to another set of stairs that leads straight down to the back of the warehouse, I throw the door open, letting it slam shut behind me.

Fresh air doesn’t help.

Nothing stops my heart from shattering.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

I allowed myself to fall for the first guy who really caught my attention. How could I let myself be so foolish?

Jerking my purse open, I tug out my keys and head for my car. I don’t know where I’m going, but I need to clear my head before I face Fool.

Hurrying to get behind the wheel, I’m glad no one is outside and that, unlike at the DRMC, there aren’t any gates or fences around the clubhouse. There’s no reason to have a gate when there’s nothing but trees and fields around the clubhouse.

I take off, spinning tires, hitting the road. I don’t know where I’m going. I have no destination in sight. I just drive, trying to clear my head. It’s not easy. I keep hearing Samuel’s voice. Venus’s. Everything I’ve tried not to believe. Even my mom’s voice fills my head, telling me I’m not good enough. That I’m worthless.

Speeding down the interstate, I ignore my phone ringing. I don’t pay any mind to the calls that keep coming. Unable to stand seeing Fool’s name pop up on my car’s display, I do something completely stupid and chuck my phone out the window.

Hours pass, and exhaustion starts to set in as I realize I’m close to the original charter of the DRMC’s clubhouse. I’ve known Stoney and them since Stoney’s Kayla’s granddad, though we all call him Pops. I could stop there, but then he’d probably call Twister, who would call Fool or Cannon. So stopping there is a no-go.

Deciding to stop at a hotel, I pull into a parking lot and find a spot near the front entrance. Gathering my stuff from the passenger seat, I get out, lock my car, and head toward the sliding double doors. Inside, I check in for a few days, figuring it would be fine here. No one knows where I am, and I can clear my head of the bullshit.

At least, that’s what I’m hoping for.

Taking the elevator to the fifth floor, I find my room at the end of the hall. I step into the room, toss my bag on a chair, and throw myself onto the bed, curling into a ball and finally letting the tears I’d been holding back fall.

It’s late when I finally gather enough nerve to turn on the TV and pull out the iPad I still had in my purse. I left my laptop in my car with the rest of my school stuff. I log in to Wi-Fi, pull up DoorDash, and order something to eat, using my dad’s card instead of my own, just as I did at the front desk. I don’t know if anyone could track me, so it feels safer. He’d given it to me years ago for emergencies, and this was definitely an emergency in my book. I didn’t want to be found if someone was looking.