Page 96 of Make Me Laugh

Olive’s nearing the end of her set and people are still filing into the grandstand. I record videos of the crowd, smiling like an idiot.

“Proud cougar, are ya?” Frankie leans in with a big grin like it wasn’t her idea for me to have a one-night stand with the hot comedian I’d never see again…

Look how that turned out, Frankie!

“I’m literally in this position because of you. Hush,” I reply when the crowd laughs at something Olive says.

I’m not paying attention to her anymore, sending a short video of the growing audience to West.

Me

No pressure, but I overheard someone saying tickets sold out in less than twelve hours after they added your name to the lineup.

I hit send on my first message but type another, sending it as soon as I’m done so I don’t chicken out.

Me

Proud of you

West

I know I asked you to take the night off and enjoy your time with Frankie… and I hope you are, but I kinda wish you were back here with me.

Couldn’t do it without you, Joey baby (in a platonic way)

“Thank you so much for having me, Philly.” The start of Olive’s goodbye pulls my attention to the stage. “I hope you’re ready for tonight’s headliner. He’s all anyone can talk about right now, taking social media by storm.” She pauses, a playful look in her eyes as the crowd cheers for West.

My phone vibrates again with back-to-back texts.

West

Enjoy the show

I hope you like my shirt

In comedy, there’s not always a wait time in between sets like a band or musician would have. At an event like this, everyone’s using the same equipment, so when I look up from my phone, I’m not surprised to see West entering from stage left.

The grandstand roars with applause.

He’s slipping his phone into the back pocket of his black cargo pants, like he’d been sending a very important message seconds before joining Olive on stage.

West dances along to the music they play for his entrance, turning around to perform an impressive twerk. The dark acid wash T-shirt he’s wearing is cropped at the perfect length, giving everyone a peek of his gray Hanes and the tight muscles around his lower abdomen and back.

I wish I had the luxury of admiring the view, but I can’t… Not when I’m fixated on the shirt he’s wearing.

The audience is going fucking wild, and West’s feeding off it. Whoever’s controlling the soundboard deserves a raise, because he catches all West’s cues. Stopping a song when West pretends to be out of breath, only to start a new one at the best time.

He’s got a cordless mic in his hand but hasn't tried to use it yet. There’s no use with how loud it is.

I know the moment Frankie places the shirt too. Her jaw hangs suspended, but the smile pulling at the corners is still evident.

When I reached my first million followers on a single platform, I collabed with an artist who drew fifty different Hex drawings, inspired by my most popular videos and turned them into one-of-a-kind-T-shirts. They all have a number hidden inside the drawing somewhere and HexedHeroine across the top in my own bubbly cursive handwriting.

I kept #1 and #13.

Frankie picked #22 and #49.

Hilda wanted #38.