Page 174 of Carnal Wagers

“He’s all yours, Liam,” Cillian stated coldly, breaking through the humdrum of my thoughts.

On screen, the two teams seemed to have converged into a large living room with furnishings that might have been white an hour ago but were now stained with blood. In the center of the room knelt a middle-aged man with his hands up. His long hair was tied at the back of his nape, and his lips were pulled back in a snarl. A gun was pressed to his head. Liam’s response garbled inaudibly through Cillian’s single earphone.

His hands clenched around the tablet, and the tips of his fingers turned white from the pressure. His cheek twitched over the tension in his jaw.

“Do it,” Cillian ground out. “I’m good where I am.”

With one heavily muffled shot, the man’s head burst backward, and his body collapsed. Within the next minute, both Cillian and the men in the back seat clicked off their devices and removed their headsets. Some of the anger and tension leaked out of Cillian’s shoulders once he put the car in drive. Yet when he backed us out of my impromptu parking spot and then the offshoot, he did so without a word.

As he turned onto the main dirt road and drove away from the cartel’s compound, his silence, exacerbated by Erel’s and his men’s, morphed into suffocating oppression. He watched the road and our surroundings with undeterred focus, gaze flicking left and right every few seconds. His fingers rapped against the steering wheel as if ready to reach for a weapon if need be. Within minutes, three heavy-duty SUVs filed in behind us, one after the other.

“Thank you for staying with me,” I said in an effort to break through the loaded silence.

The strain contorting his features eased, but the determination remained. “Always, love. Always. Nothing I’d rather do.”

“I’m not listening to this sentimental shit,” Erel groused.

“No one asked you to,” I snapped back, then turned to Cillian. “Sosa’s dead?”

He nodded with a heavy, almost growly sigh. “It’s done. The Urabá cartel has officially been wiped off the map…with Endgame’s contribution.”

It sounded like that last part smarted to say, but no one commented.

I let out a heavy exhale and slumped into my seat. At least, this was one less thing to worry about.

“You don’t regret not being the one to take the shot?”

“No.” Our fingers locked together over the center console. “But we’re not out of this yet. Not until we’re on the plane homebound, and I know you’re safe.”

Chapter 43

The moment the car pulled away from the airport tarmac in Boston, Alizé curled into me. She snuggled her nose into my neck. Her warm breaths against my skin electrified my system. Safe, she was safe, I reminded myself. I wrapped my arms around her tight, never to let her go again.

By the time we arrived at our condominium complex, she slept soundly against my shoulder. I carried her up the elevator to our penthouse.

She didn’t wake as water clapped against the bathtub and whooshed to fill it. Nor when I disrobed her and sat her in the warm water, my legs casing her in. With soft swipes of a washcloth, I washed the day off her. Then I draped her naked body in my clothes and tucked her into my bed with more care than I’d ever given anything else. And when she drowsily reached for me and weakly tugged me into bed despite my sorry state, I knew I was done for.

I used to believe I was unable to feel anything unless I forced it. At some point in the past two decades, my mind shattered into chunks. I picked my pieces up and glued them back together the best way I knew how, but it never felt like I quite fit. They always grated against one another, each one seeking out the nearest missing piece, all while chipping at the others until none of their edges matched.

Every day I wrestled them back into place with bursts of adrenaline. If I was lucky, they stifled my black thoughts and lifted the pressure shoving me down for minutes. When unlucky, I got seconds of freedom.

Then she came into my life, full of bravado, strength, and attitude, and filled in my gaps. Cracks remained, but her presence smoothed them over. Made them bearable. Gave me what I never realized I needed. She was my incentive to never give up and never give in.

If she thought I was obsessive before, she was about to learn the meaning of the word. Losing her again wasn’t an option.

All night, my fairy never left my side, and I never wavered from hers, but sleep eluded me. The instant I closed my eyes, I saw Alizé being dragged away again. I saw her disappearing in a crush of underbrush and the kick of dirt beneath tires, and my heart hammered at me to get up. To move. To run. To get her back. When my eyelids jolted open to my dark bedroom, I could still taste the dirt on my tongue and feel the impact against the car as I failed to reach her in time.

Then the warmth of her presence seeped into me. The puffs of her even exhales swathed me. The press of her leg against mine chased away the nightmare, and my demons quieted.

She was here. She was alive, but I couldn’t protect her if I wasn’t alert. I couldn’t stop the Love Knot Killer or anyone else on my long list of enemies if I fell prey to my baser instincts.

It only took one moment of inattention for everything to change. For a car accident to happen. A train to derail. A bullet to hit a target. A knife to puncture a heart. One little second was all it took for fate to change course. I refused to let a single one get the better of us.

I watched the flicker of her eyes beneath closed lids and the way her lips parted and her tongue peeked out before they closed once more. The hint of a smile cropped up as she nestled her chin against my palm with a pleased hum. Her long hair slumped over her forehead. As a strand tickled her cheek, her nose twitched, and her eyes creased. My fingers brushed the wayward strands away.

She looked peaceful, and even with the swollen bruise darkening her cheek, I believed it. This was the woman who conquered me, who tossed the world a grand old “Fuck you” when it told her she wasn’t good enough. Because she was good enough, more than that. She was the definition of exceeding expectations.

Two days ago, I thought it was the end of us. Today, I wished for forever.