Page 77 of A Scandal for the Beastly Earl

Chapter 14

But the night wasn't quite over. As they were ready to sleep, Lucien said quietly, "what Mr. Hartwell said... About Matilda wanting to end things..."

"Does it matter?" she asked gently.

"I don't know. I spent two years believing I'd failed her, that if I'd been faster, stronger, I could have saved her."

"You nearly died trying."

"But maybe she didn't want saving. Not by me." He caught her hands, stilling them. "Is that better or worse?"

"I think," Arabella said carefully, "it means you were both trapped in something neither wanted. The fire was tragic, but it wasn't your fault. It was never your fault."

"I believed it was."

"And that belief kept you hidden away for two years." She cupped his scarred cheek. "But you're not hidden anymore."

"No," he agreed. "You rather dragged me into the light."

"Kicking and screaming."

"I didn't scream. I maintained masculine dignity throughout."

"You complained. Constantly."

"Strategic verbal resistance."

She laughed, and he pulled her close, burying his face in her hair.

"I meant what I said. At the ball."

"Which part?"

"All of it. But especially the end."

"The 'I love you' part?"

"That part." He pulled back to look at her. "I didn't expect to ever say those words. Didn't think I was capable of feeling them."

"And now?"

"Now I can't imagine not feeling them. You've ruined me completely."

"Good."

"Good?"

"Yes. Because you've ruined me too. I can't imagine life without you now. You and our criminal dog and our chaotic household and our midnight conversations and terrible morning tea..."

"My tea is not terrible."

"It's awful. You use twice the leaves necessary."

"I like it strong."

"You like it to have the consistency of tar."

"It builds character."