Page 34 of Take The Risk

​Dalton shot him a quelling look, interceding, “The lady hasn’t invited you in, so you may want to respect her space.”

​Anger flared at Jeremy for whatever game he was currently playing, at Ty for having the audacity to speak for me, and even at Dalton for being so calm and reasonable and respectful. Then I felt the anger direct itself inward. Me and my stupid need to try and do the right thing. I’d sent Jeremy the information about Lock’s first baseball game, thinking he’d do what he usually did: make an excuse and not come. Why did this time have to be the time he did?

​“And you’re involved in this how?” Jeremy looked incredulous at being denied entry.

​“How about we go take a look at the deck, Ty?” Dalton gave me a long, understanding look, and I offered him a wan half-smile. Ty went to object and then thought better of it. Instead of making me step aside, which might give Jeremy a chance to enter, Ty reluctantly stepped out and followed his dad around back.

​“Jeremy,” I snapped, feeling the ache at my temples start. “First, you don’t have the right to just show up here and expect to be let in. This is my house. Second, Lock’s not even home from school yet.” Ah, damn. I felt some of my anger deflate. Lock. This was his father, and he was here to support him. God damn it all to hell. I took a mental breath and counted back from ten in my head. “I know Lock will be happy that you’re here to see his first game.” I stepped back, feeling sick, until a movement outside caught my attention. “Is that Layla?”

​Jeremy puffed. “Of course. She’s here to support him, too.”

​I gaped at him. Was he seriously that stupid? There was a court-fucking—Oh, shit. The court order only pertained to when Jeremy was alone with Lock.

​Behind me, I heard the sound of men mumbling.

​“Ah, you just realized the court order doesn’t include public gatherings,” Jeremy sneered, keeping his voice low so the others in the house couldn’t hear.

​My hand clenched so hard on the door I could feel every grain of wood.

​“Now, do you want me to tell Lock how his perfect mommy didn’t welcome his father into the house he lives in?”

​Without meaning to, I reacted to that dig. It had been one of Jeremy’s weapons for so long you’d think I’d be immune to it. I wasn’t. What’s more, the mom in me was now fully activated, just not in the way Jeremy thought it would be.

​“Lock isn’t home from school for another two hours. Come back when Lock is home. You and your mistress are welcome to find something else to do until then.” I slammed the door in his surprised face.

​Leaning heavily against it, I blinked through the tears that burned my eyes. I hated this. I hated this so much. I hated that this was how my son’s life was. I hated that woman. I hated how I knew when Lock was out of school that I would let Jeremy in because it was what was best for my son. I hated that this was probably going to be how it would be from now on.

​“Phoebe?” Dalton called softly from behind me.

​Without picking my head up, I turned just enough to see him. He had a tool belt on and a look of concern that had my lip trembling.

​“Ah, darlin’.” Dalton moved closer, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Want me to go out there and beat him up?”

​He tried to joke, but the laugh that should have come came out garbled like I was laughing underwater.

​“I’m okay.” I took a deep breath, braced my hands against the door, pushing away. I had to be okay. I was strong enough to be okay, I reminded myself. “Are you going to be working here, too?”

​Dalton considered me, and I tried not to shrink under the intensity of it. Fuck that. I was done shrinking. I squared my shoulders even as my knees thought now was a good time to get wobbly as if belying my inner monologue.

​“Yeah, the guys found something—”

​I cut him off, throwing up a hand. I had a feeling I knew where he was going, and I didn’t want to even ask. “Never mind. I have sandwiches made in the kitchen.” I fell back on what I knew best when things were riotous in my head: food.

​Dalton nodded. We chatted for a minute and then he went, leaving me alone in the house.

​I went to the living room where I’d left my notebook. Picking up my pen, I let all the words and feelings pour out of me. With each scratch of the pen against the paper, I found myself settling. By the time I was done, I felt more like the Phoebe I wanted to be. Setting aside the notebook, I went in search of a contractor who may make parts of my body tingle, and whose protectiveness made me feel something I couldn’t explain yet, but who needed to know that I was also capable of taking care of myself.

Chapter 14

​It had been two weeks since Lock’s first game and Jeremy’s impromptu visit, and things had gotten worse. So much worse.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t Jeremy that was the problem. Okay, he was still a problem. He put on quite the show when Lock had come home from school. I didn’t let him or Layla in the house, and I’d heard through town they’d “made the rounds” after I closed the door in his face. Still, he wasn’t responsible for my current mood.

​Dragging myself up the path to Helen’s house, I dreaded the night to come after the day I’d had. Who knew traveling around looking for the right claw-foot tub and bathroom fixtures would be so taxing? It wasn’t even all the shopping, and I hated shopping. I know, revoke my woman card now. No, it was spending six hours in Ty’s truck. With Ty. I’d been acutely attuned to the way he handled that monster truck (okay, it was a normal-sized truck, but to me, it felt huge) with ease.

​By the time he’d dropped me back off at home, all I’d wanted to do was crawl into bed, grab my vibrator, and revisit the nightly fantasies I had but refused to acknowledge during the light of day.

​No one knew what strain was until you spent nearly every day with a man you wanted to do every single dirty thing you’d ever thought of to you and knew that it couldn’t happen. It would never happen.