Page 93 of Beast

She drove off base. My body remembered I hadn’t been with anyone since her. But she wasn’t my girlfriend picking me up after a long deployment and Gabriel wasn’t my kid. We weren’t a couple—I barely even knew her. We were just deeply connected by this experience. This was closure, for her and for me. And really, I was curious to see how she’d adjusted back to her old life. I wanted the truth, not lies fed from a tabloid. I needed to know she was okay and why she had lied. So I could move on and put her in the past. Finally.

There was something about her now which I couldn’t figure out. A coolness. An air. She drove over the Coronado Bridge, down Coronado Avenue. Gabriel sang “Yo Gabba Gabba” songs. We pulled up to my favorite non-SEAL watering hole, Leroy’s, and sat down at one of the reclaimed wood tables. I ordered a burger and a craft beer; she had ahi tacos and a lemon drop, Gabriel had a cheeseburger, fries, and chocolate milk.

“So, how you been? Any relapses?”

She rolled her eyes. “Good, I guess. No relapses. My parents sent me to a rehab-type emotional counseling place for a month. I hated it, to me it felt like being kidnapped all over again, and being away from Gabriel, but I guess it helped. I mean, nights are still no fun—I get scared and have nightmares. Plus, I find it hard to do anything without asking for permission.”

So she was still waking up screaming at night, not from the detox but from nightmares. I wanted to be there for her, rock her to sleep.

“At least I’m healthy. I repeated all the tests Vic gave me. Luckily, no STDs. Even in the brothel, I always insisted on using a condom. Thank God prostitution was legal down there and I at least got tested. If the men refused to use one, I’d take the beating from my pimp rather than risk it. I always hoped one day I’d be able to escape.”

I wanted to tell her she was lucky, but I couldn’t figure out a way to say it without sounding like I was vetting her for sex.

Gabriel was climbing around the seat, antsy. I took out my phone and let him play Angry Birds.

“Are you going back to school?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “Maybe. I don’t know. I want to get into some kind of sex trafficking activism.”

“That’s great.” Despite my desire to take her home with me, I kept my distance. She didn’t need me dropping in and out of her life. I’d be leaving San Diego to train again in a month or so. “I saw your press conference. Why’d you lie?”

She bit her nails. “My parents thought it would be best, you know? Like my dad kept saying these people didn’t need to know our business, we’d suffered enough. By you bringing me home, we had more options. I guess people see me as a selfish brat who left her family, but isn’t that better than being seen as a sex slave?”

“I guess, Annie. Your call. But what about Gabriel? You don’t think he’ll remember? Does anyone know the truth?”

“I hope not. He’s so young. My parents have told everyone I was married to a missionary, we had Gabriel, and then his father was killed.”

I shook my head. “The more lies you tell, the harder it gets. Trust me. Someone will find out the truth.”

She shrugged. “I didn’t really have a choice, Pat. I can’t really work right now, I’m jumpy. And I need to take care of Gabriel. My parents financially support me. I had to go along with what they wanted. Chris knows, he had a right to because he was blamed for my disappearance, but he’s the only one, and my therapist. Maybe one day I’ll tell my story.”

I sighed. This wasn’t how I’d wanted her life to go, not that I had a say. I’d pictured her becoming strong and independent, hailed as a survivor. Now she still seemed to have little control over her life.

She reached across the table and touched my hand. My body craved her caress. “I need another favor.”

Why the hell not? It’d been months. I grinned and squeezed her hand. “Let’s go. I’ll take you back to my place.”

She blushed. “No, no, not that. I’m sorry I begged you that night. When I’m finally ready to be with a man I want it to be special, to mean something. Know that he loves me.”

It would be special and mean something to me. I couldn’t put my feelings about her into words. “What do you want?”

“Um, so, you can say no. But my dad wants to meet you and personally thank you for saving me.”

Fuck no. I clenched my fist. “Not going to happen, Annie. I assume you already told him how we met? Hi, sir. Well, yes, I visited a whorehouse in Aruba and hired your daughter to give me a blowjob. No way.”

“It’s important to him to meet you.”

“Sorry, Annie. But the answer is no.”

“Please. Just this once then I’ll leave you alone. I promise. He just really wants to thank you.”

“You’re not going to leave me alone until I agree?”

“Pretty much.”

“No, Annie. I can’t. I’m sorry.”

“Fine. Forget I asked.” She bit her nails, and rummaged through her purse. “I’ll leave you alone. I can take you back to base now.”