Page 38 of His Wall

"Claire — "

"I have to go, Julian."

She turned and walked away.

She did not look back at me. I stood at the railing with my hand still warm from the back of her neck and watched her get smaller along the path.

She rounded the bend by the bench.

She looked back. Once. For half a second. The wind lifted her hair and her gray eyes met mine across forty yards of running path.

Then she rounded the corner.

She was gone.

I walked home.

I did not register the kid on the tricycle on the way past. I didn’t register Mara behind the glass at the coffee shop, or the woman on the bench with a dog. Was it a dog? I couldn’t remember. I let myself into the building, rode the elevator up and unlocked the door.

Coltrane was still spinning. The needle had hit the runout groove. It was clicking against the inside of the label in a small soft rhythm I had been listening to for who knew how long.

I crossed the room. I lifted the needle. The apartment went quiet.

I stood in the middle of my living room with my keys still in my hand.

I could still taste her. The salt. The coffee. The small low sound she had made at the back of her throat when my hand had moved into her hair.

My phone buzzed in my pocket.

I pulled it out.

Unknown number.

One line.

I know what you found, Julian. We should talk.

The blood went out of my face.

I read it.

I read it again.

I sat down on the arm of the couch because my legs decided to put me there.

I had told two people. Declan and Nolan. The folder on the conference room table on Thursday. The judge's name. The shells. Six months of work I had been keeping in a locked drawer in my office and a folder under my mattress at home.

Declan had not told anyone. Declan would die before he told anyone.

Nolan had not told anyone. Nolan did not tell people things.

The conference room.

The door.

I tried to put the order back together.

Claire stood when the meeting wrapped. She started gathering the materials. I told Declan and Nolan to stay, and Claire's head came up from the folders.