Page 102 of Mate of a Monster

I don’t know what to do with that. A royal with enough power to literally trample through your head like it’s his playground—and he’s sitting on the floor of Crowsnest with his back against the wall with his head bowed and elbows resting on his knees.

I stay three feet away with my arms hanging at my sides, watching him fall apart, and I feel nothing useful. No maternal instinct swooping in to save the moment. Just the dull, familiar awareness that someone near me is in pain, and I have absolutely no idea how to fix it. I’ve not seen someone this upset—ever.

But he let me have Zev. He did confess to his mistakes and clearly feels shitty about them. He also helped break the false bond and handed me back the thing he stole—my fated bond. Now he’s crumbling, and the best I can manage is standing here like an unmarked signpost. Not even a fucking weaponized one because where the fuck is my dagger?

“He’s never gonna forgive me,” he manages between breaths. “Fuck, he’s—I fucked up.”

“Yeah.” I shift my weight. “You did.”

He flinches. His fingers dig into his hair, knuckles whitening, and another sound tears out of him that’s closer to a growl than a sob.

I should say something. Something that isn’t cruel. Something a normal person would say to another person who straight-up ruined their brother’s life out of sheer hatred for—well—me.

I crouch down instead. Creed’s head stays bowed, and I can see the tremor running through his shoulders, the way his jaw keeps clenching and releasing like he’s grinding his teeth to dust.

“Hey.”

He doesn’t look up.

“Creed.” I reach out and flick his ear.

“You need to work on your manners, Hellpet.”

His head snaps up. Red-rimmed eyes, wet lashes, an expression caught somewhere between shock and offense.

“You fucked up.” I hold his gaze. “Massively. Impressively, even. I’ve done terrible shit to survive— actually, I’ve done terrible shit in general.” His face crumples, and I press on before he can spiral. “But what’s done is done. In a twisted, ironic sort of way, you’re the reason I was able to get to him before it was too late. Even if it was all your fault. Your brother will forgive you, eventually.”

“You don’t know him.” Creed’s eyes stay on mine. “You don’t know the Legend who isn’t mated to you. Even when he thought he wasn’t, Haide, he still was. That feral, untamed part of him would still protect and forgive you.”

Those fucking words tumble through my body and knock every damn emotion on their way down.

I straighten. “I don’t know about that.”

“I do. You are like no one I’ve ever known, Haide. Special. I see it now, but Legend? He saw it from the beginning and he never forgot it. Even when I tried to force him to—a regret far too deep for repair.”

The royal searches my face for something I doubt I can offer. When nothing but silence is left in the space between us, he nods and drags his sleeve across his eyes. “He’s going to kill me.”

“Probably.” Forgiveness comes easiest in death.

“You’re supposed to say he won’t.”

“I don’t lie to people I halfway respect.” I turn toward the small kitchen, reaching for the half-drunk bottle Zev left on the counter. “And I said probably. That’s generous, coming from me.”

Creed lets out a breath that’s almost a laugh as I pour whiskey into a cup that’s more bark than ceramic.

“Why haven’t you tried to kill me yourself?” he asks. The genuine curiosity in his tone has my hands tightening on the bottle.

“Been wondering the same thing myself,” I admit, spinning to face him. “But there would be no trying. If I wanted to kill you, I would. Slowly. To make you feel everything you had a hand in making me feel.”

Blue eyes soften at the edges, and the corner of his mouth hooks up the smallest bit. “So why do I still have blood in my body?”

I stare at the pitiful royal before me, searching my mind for the truth to that question, finding it for the first time.

“I’m tired, Creed.” I don’t mean for the words to come out so quiet. I wait for him to acknowledge my weakness, but he doesn’t even blink. “All my life, I have killed without question or care. Hate and anger were all I knew, literally. It’s not sad or unfortunate; it’s just what was on the Island. Never knew any different and that was fine.”

The liquid sloshes over the rim as I fight to steady my hands.

Because the bond is pulling.