Page 90 of Awakened Ash and Alchemy

THIRTY-THREE

Angela curled up into a ball on her bed, squeezing the pillow in her arms. Too scared to sleep because of the nightmares. Too scared to think about what she’d done or what she was, trapped in this living nightmare, with her body aching from some magickal marathon. She just wanted to go home and forget everything.

There was a knock on the door. She didn’t move; she already knew who it was because she could feel him.

Throughout everything, they had this impossible connection, where she felt his emotions and he felt hers, and no one would tell her why. Even when her analytical mind kept trying to find the logical explanation, it would slip through her fingers like smoke.

Zarek opened the door. “Angela?”

She didn’t reply.

The door closed, and his steady boot steps stopped beside the bed. The mattress dipped slightly under his weight as he sat down and that ever-present warmth radiated from his skin.

“Do you want something to eat?”

“I’m not hungry.”

“No. You’re sulking.”

“So what?” It annoyed her that he could read her emotions like she did with his. And how she could feel his gentle concern that wrapped around her, whether she wanted it or not.

“You know, what you did yesterday wasn’t wrong.”

“Yeah, I did. I caused damage to the school’s property, soaked those students—who were practically interrogated by the professors over something I did.”

How could she report to class? Not after what she’d done, when she couldn’t even explain it to herself. She’d breached the wards of that classroom designed to protect them from a magick she didn’t know she had.

“I’m so sorry for…” Well, where did she begin? “For everything.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. In this realm, that’s what those classrooms are meant for, to test you so you can make mistakes. And your tiredness is normal when you first learn to use your magick, until your body gets used to it.”

“Who says I want to get used to it?” She sounded like a kid.

“When I was twelve, I burned the floor in the spells room. I was so bored, I’d taken my boots off and fell asleep upright.” He chuckled softly, a sound so rare it made her turn her head slightly to face him. “They’d made me wear sunglasses to stop me from reading the minds of the lecturers, in case I cheated on exams. Not that it worked, but I wasn’t going to tell them that.”

It made her grin that the captain would do such a thing.

“So I learned to fall asleep sitting up. No one knew. Until I accidentally burned the floor. Didn’t know how or why; I just did. It was the same as what you did yesterday with the rain.” The bed shifted slightly, and she could feel the weight of his gaze on her. “I didn’t get the lecture I thought I would. In fact, they gave me a more suitable path of learning. They organized a tutor, and my classrooms were confined to those with stone floors. Couldn’t get away with napping in class anymore.”

She couldn’t help but giggle. “Well, that explains why your rooms have slate floors and you have a leather suit etched in staves.”

His mouth curved, enough for her to catch that secret smile.

“What I’m trying to say, when normally I say nothing… is that I know what you’re going through, too.”

The fragile admission hung in the air between them. How had she not realized that this was new for him, too?

Most of all, he was trying. For her.

“So I told them you won’t be going back to class,” he continued. “I know it was part of our treaty, but it’s also more for you to learn about your magick, so I’m changing it. The Magick School lecturers are working with Bellus to have the textbooks brought here. Condorr and Tamarr are organizing a desk for this room. And by the end of the day, I’ll have a schedule for you so you can organize meetings with your tutors. I’ll even teach you how to send silver threads to the teachers who will work with you privately.”

Angela sat up in bed. “No more classrooms?”

He shook his head. “You can study in a way that suits you. To learn what you are. And you can come and go outside as you please.”

“When can I go home?” She wanted to get away from all these changes. From the stone corridors, the questioning looks that met with whispers from the others, and the overwhelming, suffocating reality that her entire world was just one big fat lie.

“Not yet.” His voice was gentle, yet heavy with regret. “I wish I could take you home, but I don’t want you in danger. When you feel up to it, we’d like to help you harness that gift you have.”