Page 46 of Meant for Mayhem

“What am I gonna do, Stevie?”

“About which part? Because I can Google annulments right now. Surely there’s a 24-hour return policy or something.”

“That’s not a thing.”

She huffed. “Well, maybe it should be. What if you saved yourself for your wedding night only to find out your husband has a micro-peen?”

My whole body shook with laughter, the heaviness lifting off me with each exhale. “Oh my god, I hate you.”

“For what it’s worth, I doubt Mikko has a micro-peen. His hands are huge.”

“Stop,” I whispered between muffled laughs. “I’m hanging up on you.”

“Okay. Well, if you change your mind, I’m two and a half hours away. Faster if I speed, and my minivan is surprisingly aerodynamic.”

“I’m fine. This is for Leena, and she deserves it.”

“You know, you deserve good things too, right? Happiness, and all that? Just because we’re women doesn’t mean we have to spend our lives serving everyone else, Shannon.”

“Hey pot, it’s kettle calling. Have you started bathing daily, or is that only for the kids still?”

“Okay, rude,” Stevie said. “And I’ll have you know, I took a bath tonight. But honestly, it wasn’t great. My boobs were above the water and I got the surprise of my life when a toy floated to the surface, looking an awful lot like poop. Who in their right mind put a brown toy inside a bath bomb for children?”

I chuckled again, rubbing at my cheeks that were sore from laughing so hard. “You know you’re crazy, right?”

“Well aware.”

A deep sigh escaped me, my head leaning back against the vanity. “I need to go back out there, don’t I?”

“Yep. He either knows you’re hiding from him or thinks you’re having a case of raging diarrhea. Could be either, at this point.”

I shook my head, laughing one more time. “Goodnight.”

“I love you.”

Instantly, tears sprang to my eyes. I wiped them away, refusing to let them fall. “Gross emotions.”

Stevie laughed again, but it sounded watery, too. “Go read a book and sleep in a bed I’m sure feels like it’s made of clouds. Then text me in the morning.”

When she laid it out like that, it sounded doable.

Read.

Sleep.

Text her in the morning.

No different from any other night.

We said goodbye, and I changed into my pajamas, then walked out of the bathroom.

It took me about two seconds to realize none of what Stevie had said would be that simple.

Mikko sat on the edge of the bed, holding a paperback book. A thin pair of wire-rimmed glasses sat on his nose, making him somehow even more attractive than before. My breath left my body in one fell swoop, making it hard for me to ignore the fact that Mikko Laaksonen was the most attractive man I’d ever seen. And I’d just married him.

He closed his paperback and set it on the bed next to him. “Everything okay?”

“Mmhmm,” I mumbled, then turned my back on him to rummage through my belongings for my pillow. “I can sleep on the floor.”