Page 8 of Stealing Blinds

Ryker: Not even close, Viper.

Jax: I think we give Merce this one. I see the logic. Did you know that’s actually about horses?

Mercy: Yes! Shakespeare. I’ll teach Remy about that this afternoon.

We all homeschool Remy, offering our unique gifts to his education. The kid is a genius. And we’re phenomenal teachers. He’s already mastered several card tricks and can lift Pixie Styx off his Aunt Tessa like a pro.

Me: How are horses involved?

Maddox: The goose chase.

They make no fucking sense.

Tessa: Have you ever noticed how often our text threads revolve around animals?

Maddox: No raccoons this time.

I’m still not sure what the raccoon reference is about. It comes up from time to time, but sometimes, it’s best to just keep moving.

Jax: Straight from the goose’s mouth.

Mercy: That one really is horse. Even I know that.

Me: How the hell do we get anything done?

Ryker: I have been saying that for years.

Axel: Collectively, you and your sidekicks accomplish one person’s job. Ryker and I do the rest.

As the slight appears on my phone, I stroll into The Corpse Reviver Cabaret. The lights are up for rehearsal, but the smoky jazz-club feel is ever present. Velvet booths and table lamps. Historical photographs, detailing our nostalgia—music legends and covert meetings. The grandeur and depravity we were founded on.

My Noire domain is entertainment and employee satisfaction, though I focus on the former, and Maddox handles the bulk of the latter.

Maddox: Scorned! That is a gross exaggeration, Papa Axe.

Axel: What is the last work-related task you did today, Mad?

A chuckle escapes me as I sidle up to the manager to knock out a business matter, despite the suggestion that I don’t work. “Are the understudies good to go?”

“Yeah.” He sighs, clearly exhausted. “We’re managing. I still have a handful out sick, but I shifted a few numbers around to accommodate.”

“We aren’t full this week. Cut a couple of shows, have the front desk alert the changes to the guests, and give your crew time to rest and rehearse.”

His relief is immediate, and that’s what makes Axel’s dig true. Our staff frets far more about letting us and the guests down than I do, so my job is easy. That’s primarily because we’ve worked hard to create that employee culture. Even so, we’re all hands-on owners, but Axel and Ryker deal with members’ drama. Since our clientele is Mafias, dirty politicians, assassins, and secret societies, that drama is plentiful. Maddox, Jax, and I recognize that, but fucking with them is too satisfying.

I make myself comfortable at the owners’ table to enjoy the show—onstage and via text.

Maddox: Today is not the best example because Cash has us on this horse chase. I’m trying to hold the reins and impregnate my wife. Multitasking in the saddle is a tight fit this morning, if you know what I mean. *eggplant emoji*

Tessa: That is exactly how I planned to share that news with the fam.

Maddox: I got you, baby girl.

Axel: Was the emoji necessary for that explanation?

Jax: Some people are visual learners, Papa Axe.

Mercy: Ooh, Zara and Axel need to try. We can all have babies the same age.