Page 83 of Sexting my Bratva Daddies

But as I fell asleep, my hand drifted to my abdomen.

Their love, their protection, might not be enough to make me stay. I hated to even let the thought have a single second, but I refused, I refused, to let my child get hurt because I was too weak to walk away.

31

PEYTON

I spent two days thinking through every single possibility and every option. I’d allowed myself time with all three of my men, and now I had to count the cost.

They’d done a hell of a job hiding that from me, but my eyes were wide open and I couldn’t hide. If I went forward, it would be with the full knowledge of the bloodshed that came with the reality of their world.

The day after they rescued me, I spent hours in bed. Recovering. That’s what they said, and I let it go.

I told them to go to work, but they stayed in the penthouse, taking care of business remotely and watching over me.

I’d wanted some time alone to think, but I didn’t want to be alone. It made no sense to me, so I kept it to myself and let them do what they needed to feel better about the situation.

We spent our nights together, curled around one another, and it was the most uneasy sleep I’d experienced since falling for them.

By the next day, I’d reached a conclusion.

I couldn’t accept the cost of their world.

Not after discovering the secrets they’ve been keeping from me.

Not to mention, I had my own secret now. A secret I needed to think about above everything else.

But life without Leo, Misha, and Viktor terrified me.

I loved them. Thinking about leaving felt like ripping out my own heart and stomping on it.

Loving them came with consequences, and even though I loved them more than I ever thought I could love anyone, love was not enough.

Love would not protect my baby.

Love would not keep men like Anton from coming after me and my child once they knew. And I would not allow myself to let my child be the cost of my love. That tiny, precious life came first.

I hated myself for figuring out the perfect solution. They’d practically spoon fed it to me, though. I winced at the thought of putting Viktor and Misha through another loss so close to what they’d already suffered. They’d survive, though. They were tough men. They might mourn me for a while, but they would recover. They’d move on.

Sitting outside a coffee shop on the fourth day after my kidnapping, I evaluated my plan for anything I’d missed. A car horn blew, and I stood and waved, smiling at the woman who’d parked the unremarkable silver sedan.

“Hey, thanks for meeting me here.” I fidgeted with my purse strap, keeping my eyes downcast.

“Oh, honey, don’t worry about it.” The woman patted my arm once, then held out the keys. “Everything’s taken care of. You have a full tank of gas.”

My throat tightened at the lie I’d told to convince this woman not to put my name on any of the paperwork when I bought the used car from her. She believed I was running from an abusive ex. I hadn’t told her that, but my furtiveness had driven her to the conclusion and I hadn’t corrected her. I adjusted my sunglasses and cleared my throat. “Thank you. You have no idea what that means to me.”

“Just get out. Get somewhere safe.”

I nodded. “I will.” I handed over the cash and slid behind the wheel. It took longer to drive and park than it should have, because I kept having to stop and wipe my eyes as tears poured in rivers. I’d made one more stop on the way.

Walking into the butcher shop and asking for a gallon of pig’s blood had caused the man behind the counter to roll his eyes, but he’d handed it over with little more than a grunt.

Guess I wasn’t the first person to ask. He took my money and disappeared into the back before I even made it to the door. I parked down the street from where I’d left my car at the mall and walked the rest of the way.

My throat closed. I kept walking. I had to keep walking because if I stopped, even for a second, I would not start again.

I’d convinced them to go to work today, promising I would be fine. I told them I wanted a few hours alone with some retail therapy and I’d meet them at the office.