Page 83 of Wrecked

“Don’t be upset,” he says.

“Upset?” I ask, moving away from him and the tree, tripping over myself in the darkness. “I’m not upset. Why would I be? You were just humping me against a spruce and letting me jerk you off, only to push me away and say you don’t want to fuck me.”

“Exactly. I don’t want to fuck you up against a tree in the middle of the woods with your friends twenty yards away. Sorry if I’m trying to be chivalrous.”

My friends.

Jessica.

“Shit!” I cry and slam my hand against a tree. Well, that hurt. A lot. I pull my hand into my chest and shake away the sting.

What the hell am I doing out here with Adam when Jessica is at the camp, waiting for her friend and the guy she is crazy about to come back from the world’s longest pee in the woods? I am the worst person on the planet.

I start to walk through the trees, heading toward the amber light. Adam is quickly by my side.

“No,” I say to him as I stop. “Let me go back first.”

“We’ve been out here for a long time. They probably know what was going on.”

“I don’t want them to know anything. As far as they are concerned, we were arguing.”

He grabs my wrist and pulls me toward him. The moon is shooting through the trees, cascading a white light across his face. “I said I didn’t want to take you for the first time up against a tree. I didn’t say I wanted to pretend what we did didn’t happen.”

Pulling my wrist from his grasp, I step back and start to walk away. “Jessica is my friend, Adam. I have many faults, but an honest friend I will forever be. Not to mention, this can’t happen. What if someone finds out you’re sleeping with me? You could lose your job, and I would lose my bar. Between the two of us, you’re supposed to be the mature one. You’re supposed to keep me straight. Instead, you’re letting me corrupt you, the same way I do with everyone else.” My eyes begin to burn, but I’ll be damned if I start crying.

He leans in, and his hands reach out to grab me, but I back away.

“I care about you,” he says.

“If you care about me, you’ll stay away.”

chapter NINETEEN

“What are you doing here?” Toby pops his head into the bathroom I am grouting.

“I can’t make it on my usual day, so I thought I’d lend a hand today.” I’m on my hands and knees, wiping sanded grout into the crevices of the tiles the crew laid yesterday. I can’t lay tile for shit, but I can read directions, mix a bag of Polyblend, and scoop it onto the floor with a trowel.

“This place is addicting, isn’t it?” he says.

“Surprisingly so.” I lean back onto my heels and wipe the sweat off the top of my head.

“You need help in here?” he asks, adjusting his hair under the trucker hat he has on his head.

“No, thanks. I want to work alone today.” To prove my point, I take the earbuds hanging around my neck and slide them into my ears.

“Oh, cool. All right. Keep up the good work. Holler if you need a hand.”

Toby leaves, and I am left in the small bathroom, a place I volunteered to spend my day away from everyone. I spread the grout into the small joints and let it set for fifteen minutes. When I’m at the opposite end of the bathroom, I work my way back to the beginning and wipe the muddy floor with a wet sponge.

I move to the other bathroom in the home and grout it as well. By lunchtime, I have no excuse to stay in the bathrooms, so I work my way downstairs and take my spot under the tree where Adam and I have been having our lunch for the last few weeks.

When my dad saw me leaving this morning, he ran out with a packed lunch. Leave it to Bob to get excited at the thought of making his little girl a lunch, like he did when I was in grade school. He even wrote me a note.

Your mind will give back to you exactly what you put into it.

It’s a James Joyce quote. I know I get my idiosyncrasies from my dad. He, the lover of all things Joyce. Me, the great defender of McConaughey.

Chewing on Dad’s homemade taffy, I look up at the three homes that are almost ready for their owners. Roger and Vivienne Montgomery, the wounded veteran and his wife, will be ready to move in next week. The Framers, who lost their daughter to a fire, will be in shortly after, and the Mikguses will be out of the shelter before Halloween. We aren’t making the timetable we hoped, but we are doing a kick-ass job.