Page 26 of A Really Bad Idea

“Natasha’s nice.”

His head rests against mine. “Angela invited her. She saw us in Starbucks and assumed I was bringing her. It got awkward, so I just told her to come.”

“You should have gone home with her.”

He lets out a deep breath. “That relationship has run its course.”

I lift my head and appraise him. “Why are you punishing yourself by putting your life on pause?”

He leans back on his heels and looks down at me. “Where did that come from?”

I shrug. “I don’t know. Just something that’s been on my mind. I’ve been pondering my life’s plan and how far off I am. Made me think of yours and how right on track yours is. I just don’t want you to miss out on love. That’s all.”

“Being a surgeon is the only thing I’ve ever wanted to be. I always assumed the rest would fall into place.” He pauses a moment, his teeth skimming his lower lip as he considers his answer. “Plus, I guess I haven’t met the right woman who’ll have me.”

I nod lightly and place my head back on his shoulder. Our feet move in a familiar box step, yet I can’t ever remember dancing with him before.

“Meadow,” he murmurs, “you really want to be a mother, don’t you?”

I close my eyes and whisper, putting it out into the universe, “More than anything else in the world.” He squeezes my hand as I pull him closer. “I had this perfect life planned, and suddenly, it was swept out from under me. That future I envisioned is now a memory of what I hoped it would be. And I’m okay with it, I think. I mean, it is what it is, but I want the same things I did two years ago. Except, now, I have to figure out a new way to make it happen.”

“You don’t think you’ll fall in love again?”

“I want to. That’s why I don’t want to settle for someone who doesn’t make my heart race. I want someone who makes me laugh. Someone who challenges me to be better and misses me when I’m not around. Someone I can snuggle up with on the couch and read at the end of a long day. Who I can cook with and take care of when he’s sick—”

His feet halt. “Wait. Your dream is to take care of a man when he’s sick?”

I step back and look at him. “Sure. That’s the best part of loving someone.”

There’s a slight flinch in his body. His hand splays on my back, his fingers gripping on to my trench, pulling me in a touch more. Christian raises our hands into his chest and my heart with it. Our bodies are close—closer than they’ve ever been before. I can feel his heart beating wildly in his chest, thumping proudly behind the veil of muscle and masculinity.

“You deserve all that, Meadow. If I can promise you one thing, it’s that there is a man who loves you and all your quirks.”

I raise a brow. “What are these quirks you speak of?”

His chest rumbles. “You have interesting taste in romance literature and an unhealthy obsession with boy bands from the nineties.

“Fine, I’m quirky.”

“You’re fucking adorable, and any man would be lucky to have you as his own. You just have to love him as much as he loves you.”

I gaze into his eyes and see them looking into mine, falling into the abyss of something that my soul seems to be telling him.

And he’s listening with pure intent.

“Of course, he’d have to be handsome and charming and make me laugh,” I convey.

“Remember what they say about the perfect man. He doesn’t exist,” he says as he slowly gives me a spin and then releases my hand.

Losing his warmth is unsettling as I right myself next to him.

“Are you saying you’re not the perfect man? Why, Dr. Gallagher, I thought you fancied yourself the perfect catch?”

He grins. “I have my faults. Come, let’s get you home, so you can watch This Is Us. I know your Saturday nights are reserved for catching up on your shows. It must be killing you not to have your weekly cry.”

I hit him in the arm. “It’s about the love of a family. You should watch it.”

“So is Braveheart, and you refuse to watch that film.”