Page 107 of Wild Abandon

His mouth falls to mine, and when he looks back at me, those beautiful green eyes gazing straight into mine, I can’t hold it in any longer.

“I love you.”

I didn’t want to say it, but when his mouth widens into a smile and tears well in his eyes, I am so glad I did.

My body tightens as the pressure rises.

And when we find our release, we cry into each other’s mouths.

Naked, entwined, running my fingers over the roses, I watch as Nate falls asleep, holding me tight.

Our perfect moment together. Our last moment together.

chapter TWENTY-THREE

I don’t wait for Nate to wake up. His body deep in slumber, he doesn’t feel me slip out of his arms. If I stay, our good-bye will be that much harder.

Slipping my clothes on, I grab my purse and take one last look at him. He looks so peaceful. He’s not a superhero. He’s just Nate. Sleeping, peaceful Nate.

The sun has risen, and the room is cast in sunlight. Around the room are photos I was unable to see last night. Perhaps it’s because I didn’t want to see them last night. Now, in the glowing daylight, they’re sitting in spotlights of sunshine peeking through the window.

I walk to the wall and take them in. A photo of a young boy in a Giants cap and a woman with matching green eyes. Another of a young girl with black hair standing with a red-haired woman and a young-looking Ed Martin. A larger photo of Ellie in dance apparel sits on a table. She was very beautiful. Petite and lean. Her long dark hair is up in a bun, and her dark eyes are large and bright, full of life. There are photos of Nate and Ellie at a party, another of them on the beach, and a few of them with friends. In every picture, she doesn’t look to be smiling for the camera. She’s laughing.

I grab my coat off the hook and see one last picture. Nate and Ellie at a festival. They’re younger. Nate with a full head of hair, shaggy and falling in front of his eyes. He’s clutching a red Solo cup in one hand, and a beautiful young Ellie is in the other. She has on cutoff shorts, a tank top, and a flower wreath around her head. If I had to guess, it was taken the day they met. The day they fell in love.

An odd sensation passes through my veins. It’s not guilt, like I know I should be feeling.

Who knows what is right or wrong anymore?

What I do know is that I love Nate, and I needed this closure. I needed him one last time.

Taking one final look at Nate, I memorize his face. This is the last time I will ever see him.

I don’t call Naomi to pick me up. I’m not ready to return to Napa.

I hail a taxi and take myself as far away from Nathaniel Teller as I possibly can.

chapter TWENTY-FOUR

NATE

Henley’s Pub. On a Tuesday. Three o’clock.

Same place, same day, same time as the day Crystal walked into my life.

Except today there is no chance of her walking in. She hasn’t been back here in a month, and from the way I woke up, alone, naked, on the couch of my San Francisco apartment, I know she won’t be coming back.

It was weird, waking up with the lingering smell of cherry on my skin. That’s what Crystal smells like. Cherries. She thought I called her Red because of her hair. No. It was the cherries. And it was poured all over my skin. I didn’t shower for three days. I couldn’t. It was my last piece of her.

That, and the memory of her hands over my heart, gently caressing the roses etched on my skin for her.

Always her.

I remember the day she walked into the bar for the first time. I had just finished mopping the floor from the mess the crew had made from installing the new equipment. The bar was closed, but I must have forgotten to lock the doors because in walked the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Long auburn hair and a heart-shaped face adorned with bright green eyes. She had porcelain skin, so smooth that it begged to be touched, and a mouth so full that it begged to be kissed.

No, it was me that was begging. But I held back.

For as pretty as she was, she had an air about her. Shoulders back, chin up, she walked into a room like she owned it. And, damn, did she. I told her once how she intimidated men. I was including myself.