Page 117 of Safe Word

Hail Mary, full of grace…

Paula’s lips touched mine, as soft as absolution, as scorching as a sacrament.

The Lord is with thee…

She kissed me again, a fragile, desperate thing. And my breath fell.

Blessed art thou among women.

Her mouth warmed against mine like a confession. I shuddered, undone by the miracle of her touch.

And blessed is the fruit of thy womb…

Holy Mary, Mother of God… pray for us sinners….

My hands pushed into her hair, clutching her closer, the knife inches from her face. Her soft sigh shattered the last of my prayer.

Now… for it is the hour of my death…

‘Don’t leave me,’ she whispered, a plea and a curse in one.

I answered her mouth with my own, drawn by the need to claim, to be forgiven. To taste the offered fruit she would have never given me otherwise.

‘I need you,’ she breathed, the confession splitting me apart. ‘Cain…’

I went still, the air fracturing inside me, burning through me like lightning.

That name again… That fucking name – a thorn jammed into my ear, a venom that burned hotter than hellfire.

He was inside her. He had slithered into her thoughts, her dreams, into the sacred depths of her soul again. He’d wrapped himself around her – and she didn’t even see she was choking on his filth.

My teeth clenched. My breath sawed in and out.

He had corrupted her! Twisted her with his filthy hands, filled her mouth with curses!

She believed his touch was her sanctuary. That his presence could save her. And in that belief, she betrayed the sanctity.

Of us.

My heart stopped, my lungs seized as she stilled beside me, sleep claiming her with her hands still around my neck.

It ached.

Because my angel had strayed. And before she could bless the blade… she had to be made holy again.

And D’Angelo…

He needed punishment, too.

But not tonight.

No.

Tonight, I would become my own martyr – restraint would be my offering, penance my proof of faith.

They would live, not because I forgave them, but because punishment had to be earned.

Death was a mercy. And mercy was not what sinners deserved.