Page 9 of Crown: Phase 4

“This shit ain’t easy to say.”

Crown slammed his palm against the desk, sending his helmet crashing to the floor.

“What the fuck you mean it ain’t easy to say? Smoky, nigga, now ain’t the time to be playing with me. I got another war brewing on my hands, and when I looked around, you were nowhere to be found. I thought something happened to you. Then my wife steady blowing up my phone, and I ain’t got no answer for when the fuck I’m coming home. So, you better tell me something before I lose my shit.”

Smoky licked his lips and rubbed his sweaty palms together before scooting his chair closer to the desk. He wanted to say, nigga, you already losing it. But this wasn’t the time for that. Instead, he rested both hands on the edge of the desk, trying to steady the slight tremble creeping through them.

“Me and you been rockin’ since we were kids, bro. You know me. You know I’d never do nothing to snake you. As far as I’m concerned, we blood. I’d lay down my life for you.”

Crown leaned forward. “And that’s exactly why I’m confused. So, talk.”

“You remember how you kept your other life from me? The architect shit?”

“What the fuck that got to do with anything?”

“I ain’t been telling you everything either.”

Crown narrowed his eyes, staring at him. In all the years they’d known each other, he’d never seen his best friend look like this. Smoky had stared down guns without flinching, walked into fights without hesitation, and dismembered bodies without a care in the world. But now he sat across from Crown, looking damn near terrified. His hands trembled, his breathing had turned shallow, and the words refused to come. After a long pause, Crown glanced toward Danger, who had been leaning silently against the wall.

“Bro, step out.”

Danger’s brows knitted together. “The fuck for?”

Crown slowly cut his eyes toward him once more, and the silent warning was enough. Danger exhaled a stream of smoke through his nose before yanking the office door open and slamming it shut behind him. Normally, Crown would’ve checked him for slamming his shit. This time, he let it slide, too concerned with Smoky.

“What is it?” He questioned.

Smoky swallowed one last time before forcing the words out. “I’m gay.”

The confession landed like a brick to Crown’s chest. He didn’t blink. Didn’t move. Couldn’t even breathe. He just stared at Smoky, trying to make sense of what he’d heard. Very little ever caught him off guard. Crown prided himself on reading people before they ever opened their mouths. He could usually sense when somebody was lying, hiding something, or plotting behind his back. His instincts had kept him alive for years. But this…this had never crossed his mind. Not once.

“What the fuck you mean you gay? You telling me you been fuckin’ over your wife with a nigga?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“Then what the fuck you saying, muthafucka?”

Crown’s eyes burned a deep shade of red as anger and disbelief collided inside him. His pulse pounded so hard against his temples he swore a blood vessel was about to burst.

“T knows. She’s been known. I told her the truth a long time ago. She stayed because we have an arrangement. I ain’t here to explain my marriage. I’m telling you I’m gay. And the nigga whose house I just left…I been seeing for a little minute. But I swear to God I ain’t know Maino was Boe’s cousin until we ran up on him that day. I hid this part of my life from you because…” Smoky stopped, struggling to get the words out. He looked away before letting out a defeated sigh.

“’Cause…shit, I don’t even gotta say why. We both know why. I’m telling you now because the life I been hiding finally caught up with me, bro. Full circle.”

Crown remained silent. His eyes searched Smoky’s face, looking for any sign that this was a lie or some sick joke, but all he found was pain. Shame. Fear. Over twenty years of friendship sat across from him, looking more vulnerable than he’d ever seen him.

Crown was angry. There was no denying that. But beneath the anger was something else. Confusion. Sadness. Sympathy, even. The realization that his best friend had carried this secret alone for years had him wanting to take off his president’s hat and respond as Smoky’s brother. In a perfect world, he would’ve told him everything was going to be aight… that it didn’t matter…that he still loved him regardless.

However, the timing made that nearly impossible. A war was knocking at Crown’s door. He had to worry about if Maino said anything about Boe’s disappearance. And despite everything Smoky had just confessed, one question refused to leave Crown’s mind. Why had he gone to Maino’s house?

“You went to warn him.”

“Yeah,” Smoky admitted quietly.

“That wasn’t a fuckin’ question. I know.”

Smoky’s chest rose and fell with uneven breaths. He stared at the floor as sweat gathered along his hairline and beneath his arms, soaking through the fabric of his shirt underneath his vest. He’d rather take a beating than sit through this conversation.

Crown watched him for a long moment before asking the one question he wasn’t sure he wanted the answer to. Then again, he felt like he already knew. Body language spoke volumes, and Smoky’s was screaming.