Page 29 of The Caged Viking

He shook his head. “Egil tells me that you were accosted at least a dozen times as you walked, unescorted, around the camping grounds today, despite my orders to the contrary, by the by, that you stay in the tent. He followed you and witnessed several arse pinches, two embraces that lifted you off your feet, a half dozen offers of coin for tupping, and many rude insults.”

“Egil has a big mouth.”

“You are just now realizing that?”

She sighed with impatience. “Get to the point. I can’t stay in hiding forever. What’s going to change their attitude?”

“Consummation.”

“Whaat? Do you mean sex?”

“That is what I said, is it not?”

“Actually it wasn’t. You tossed that out there as if consummating a marriage was an everyday occurrence. You could just as easily have said, ‘We need to bake some bread.’”

“Did you hit your head when we did that whirly dance through the sky and fell to the ground?”

“You know, your attitude is really annoying me. Certainly not a way to woo a woman to your bed.”

Well, she certainly put him in his place. He blinked with surprise.

“So, consummation would change the way men view me?”

“Probably. Word has spread that you and I were just wed, with no chance for the ritual bedding. Until that happens, some consider you fair game. ’Tis a well-known fact that the sap rises in warriors as they prepare for battle. Any willing, or unwilling, female will do. And there you are like a bloody haunch of roast reindeer on a silver platter.”

“Thanks a lot for the compliment. So, we should just do it? Now? Should we duck into some empty tent? Or go behind a tree? Assuming your sap is up and running, like all the other randy men. And, by the way, do women have sap, too?” She fluttered her eyelashes at him in an exaggerated fashion.

“Sarcasm ill-suits you, wife.”

“Likewise, husband. That’s another thing. I’m not really your wife. That farce of a wedding…? Pfff!”

“Oh, that your assumption were true!”

“What do you mean?”

“Are you forgetting that the rites were performed by a priest? I saw him sign a document, which I assume gets a church seal.”

Any further discussion on that subject was interrupted by Egil rushing up to them, huffing to catch his breath. “My Lord, please stop and listen. There is something of importance I must discuss with ye.”

Egil had been trying to speak with him about some “important matter” all day. When Egil had admitted that it was not a matter of life or death, Hauk had put him off. “Later.”

“Nay, m’lord. It must be now,” Egil contended.

Hauk groaned. “Egil, please. I must needs meet with Sweyn first about something my wife just told me. Then, Sweyn wants my help with battle strategy, and a map of the inner design of the castle to weed out any stragglers once they break in. You could help with that, Egil, since you moved freely about the lower regions of the castle. After that, he expects me to regale him with a history of all that I suffered under Aethelred’s imprisonment. And, you can be sure, he’ll want an explanation of that Holy Fuck dance I just did up in the air.” He glanced at Kirstin on mention of this last thing. “Sweyn will want to know if you can you do that at will, wife, and if so, he will think that such a skill could come in handy during battle.”

“What will you say to that?” she asked.

“I will say, Sweyn, my friend, if you think I will willingly subject myself to that terror again, I have a bridge to sell you over the North Sea. If he wants to win this battle, he will need weaponed men, the more the better. Not tricks.”

“Speaking of seasoned fighters,” Egil broke in, “some of yer shiphird, who have been hanging about Jorvik these many months manning your longship, Sea Wolf, have arrived and are looking to join the ranks. They need direction on where to gather. There aren’t many of them left, actually, about two dozen or so, but…”

Hauk pointed a hand in the opposite direction. “Find an empty space in my formation for all of them, and I will come by shortly to talk to each of them. Make sure they are fed and have places to lay their furs for rest.”

He could use both of those himself…food and sleep. A short nap somewhere private to prepare for battle. Anywhere would do. Even the hard ground, against a tree if there were any left in this clearing with all the cook fires now blazing, or spooned against some mongrel dog in an open field. Or a wife, he thought, and immediately wiped that idea from his lame brain, but it made him smile.

Egil mistook his smile for agreement to talk with him, now. “It all started about a year ago when I happened—”

Hauk cut him off with a halting hand. “Is this about that bedmate of yours again?” he growled. “I swear, I have seen and heard enough of—.”