Page 2 of Mated to the Grumpy Alien

I ended up here, in a mountainous area far enough from the crash site that no one bothers me and cold enough to remind me of the icy fjords where I was I raised. There’s a village nearby, populated by the native species of humanoids. They’re close enough to Persæns that I suspect this planet was once visited by the Sullec prophets. But if I’m right, that happened a lot later here than it did on Perse, because the people who live down in the valley below my fortress are … primitive to say the least. They’re still down there trying to keep the village fire lit. Forget the basics of civilization like metallurgy or electricity. Thus, my statement about being a god among men.

Sure, I’m arrogant, but even I’m not arrogant enough to believe I’m actually a god. But compared to the ignorant beings who live down in the valley below my cave? Compared to those idiots? Yeah. Compared to them, I’m a god.

Even if I’m lonely, at least I have someone to talk to. Even if that someone isn’t a living being, but a mere sliver of a once great AI Historian, Cygnus.

There are days, however, when I wish Cyg wasn’t quite so smart, quite so observant, or quite so fucking pushy.

Case in point, I’m elbow deep in overhauling my generator when Cyg announces, “There is a matter in the village that may require your attention.”

“My attention is pretty focused right now, Cyg. The circuit on this board will be fried if I don’t get this solder right. So unless it’s a matter of life and death, I suggest you a take a viz of it and I’ll review it later.”

Cyg is always bitching at me about something or another he thinks I need to intervene on down in the village. As if it’s on my personal shoulders to drag those idiots out of the stone age.

“It is, in fact, a matter of life and death.”

Of course it fucking is. “My life? Yours? Because if we fry too many more circuits, you’re going to have to talk me through building a damn steam engine to power your ass.”

He ignores my smartassery, as he always does.

“There is a woman in the village who seems to have stumbled into a bit of trouble.”

“Isn’t there always?” I grumble, flicking off the soldering blade. My concentration is fracked and since he’s clearly not letting this go, I might as well stop now before I do more harm than good. I set the blade down on the heat-resistant table and push my goggles up off my eyes. “What is it this time, Cyg? Some child fall into the river again? Someone nearly burn down their grain stores?”

“A strange woman wandered into the village and has managed to enrage Torvin.”

Torvin is the local brute and bully. He’s strong enough to keep the other men in line, smart enough to keep the village fed, and just mean enough to control everyone else. Yeah, the guy’s a bit of dick, but I’ve seen worse. Not exactly a great leader, but he’s kept the village functioning since his father died.

“Well, if she pissed off Torvin, then that’s her problem.”

“She is an outsider.”

I dust my hands off on my pants and turn to prop my hip against the workbench. “Still not my problem.”

“You misunderstand me. She is an outsider. Like you.”

I freeze. “She’s Persæn?”

“No. She appears to be a humanoid like those in the village. However, she is like you in that she is out of her time.”

“Out of her time? What the hell do you mean?”

“Her appearance, her language, and her gear all indicate a level of advanced technology we have yet to see on this planet.”

“Kill the double talk. What do you mean?”

“Do you remember the cosmic event, which occurred roughly four days ago?”

“Yeah.” A couple of days ago, something happened that I assumed at first was an earthquake, maybe a volcanic eruption. The ground shook, the sky went dark, sonic boom. Very doomsday stuff.

Cyg assured me it wasn’t an earthquake, but something else. Something he’s been calling a Cosmic Event of Undetermined Origin that “appears to have created a ripple in space/time.”

I have no idea what he’s measuring in the ground or the atmosphere that led him from sonic boom to a ripple in space/time. Frankly, I didn’t think he had that kind of computing power in this system I’ve puzzled together. But, he is a self-repairing AI, and I gave him free reign when I uploaded him from the tiny chip in my head to the system in the fortress.

“You’re saying you think this mystery woman came through space/time during that cosmic event?” I ask.

“Uncertain.”

I pull the goggles fully off and toss them down onto the workbench before leaving the work room. I make sure the door seals fully behind me. This room, the innermost room of my fortress, contains the bulk of tech I scavenged from the crash, as well as everything I’ve managed to reverse engineer since then: my generator, my computers, my micro reactor. All the tech I could live without but wouldn’t want to. Everything I possess that keeps my life on this planet from being absolute hell.