Page 12 of Awaken My Heart

Seriously, what is wrong with me?

Physical attraction is just that, a jumble of hormones and physiology. Nothing more. I need to get over my little obsession and focus on more important things. Like my kids and their production. That’s what matters.

I repeat a form of that as if it’s my new mantra the entire drive out to Bram’s house. What was I thinking, insisting on helping him? I should approve the plans and leave. I can let go of this one thing. I’ll still be doing nearly the entirety of the costumes and, obviously, directing. So yeah, I should just let him do his thing.

It’s a stupid fantasy and nothing more.

I turn down the gravel drive, passing the whimsical mailbox shaped like a barn. I see the two-story white farmhouse standing on a rise of the property, sitting like a sentinel watching over everything surrounding it. It’s getting kind of late, and the sun is setting, so it’s hard to tell if the shutters are a dark blue or black.

But the wrap-around porch circles the house, on both levels. It’s what a home should look like. Not at all like the one I mostly grew up in. The one with wheels underneath and carpet that smells of cigarettes and stale beer.

I shove those memories aside as I spot Bram leaning against the corrugated metal wall of an outbuilding. He looks so casual and at home in his skin. Which obviously he should be because this is his home.

Dammit.

“Clear the mind of your dirty thoughts, Emma.” Don’t look over and notice how good his massive thighs look hidden inside those well-worn blue jeans. Definitely don’t notice how today he doesn’t have a button up shoved up to his elbows. Nope, today is even worse because he’s wearing a black t-shirt that hugs his torso like a possessive lover.

Now I’m jealous of a shirt. Outstanding!

Maybe I’m having a vitamin deficiency. Something I used to absorb through the Houston smog? Maybe all this clean air in Saddle Creek is messing with me.

I put my compact car in park and take a slow breath.

“You’ve got this, Emma. Smile and for the love of everything holy, don’t touch him again.”

I paste my smile on and get out.

“Find it okay?” he asks.

“Yes. No problems at all.” I have my work bag slung over my shoulder as I walk towards him. “I brought my laptop and tablet so we can search for set ideas.”

He nods. “I’ve already gathered some ideas as well. And I read through the script.”

My steps falter. “You read the script?”

“Yeah. Seemed like a logical thing to get a feel for the story and characters.”

“Oh, yes, I suppose that does make sense. Like I said, I’m accustomed to doing most of the heavy lifting for my productions on my own.”

He leads me into the outbuilding, giving me a wide berth as he does it.

Much to my surprise the inside of the building isn’t as rustic as I was expecting. Yes, there are a lot of power tools and equipment in here. Sawdust lines the floor underneath most of them. But then off to the right is a seating area that looks like it could be the living room in a regular home. And I’m pretty sure it’s air conditioned in here.

“This is very nice,” I say.

He grunts and walks over to a counter-height table. “This is what I came up with.” He holds the papers out to me instead of walking them the short distance to where I stand. “If you could just look at these ideas and approve them. Then I can get started and you can be on your way.”

I snatch the papers out of his hand and glance down at the printouts.

“I was thinking one main set piece on wheels that we can rotate to fit different scenes.”

I’m annoyed that his idea is a good one. This man deserves to be taken down a peg or two. But his selections for the sets are spot on. Colorful and full of whimsy. Everything a set should be for a Dr. Seuss inspired musical.

I step closer to him, and he shifts so he’s further behind the table.

“Look, I said I was sorry I touched you yesterday at the tattoo place. It was inappropriate and rude. But you don’t need to be afraid of me. I’m not going to attack you. I do have self-control.”

“It’s not you I’m worried about,” he mumbles.