Page 27 of The Editor’s Choice

Emily: What else do you expect me to do?! There’s not another way out of this mess, D. You know that as well as I do.

Dawson: I guess you shouldn’t have gotten yourself into this fucked up situation then, huh? It’s not right for Jade to pay for your fuck up. Figure it out.

Mess? What kind of mess is Emily in? And how does it have anything to do with me? Panic starts to set in at the tone of their texts. Concern for my longtime friend seems to trump everything I just learned about her deception for the moment.

My mind is spinning, faster and faster until I’m physically dizzy, which spurs the nausea. Thoughts of how I missed all the clues, the time we’ve all spent together, and all the memories rush to the forefront of my mind, and for just a moment, I’m crushed. The sadness creates a physical ache inside my chest that I would imagine being akin to being squeezed to death by a giant vice of some sort. It’s a pain unlike anything I’ve ever encountered before.

The boiling rage surfaces shortly after, pulling me from the bed we’ve shared for so long. Suddenly desperate to be as far from him as possible, I make my way to the kitchen silently, thoughts swirling of the future and what comes next.

As I shut the fridge door, lo and behold, Emily appears out of thin air on the far side of the kitchen, rubbing her eyes to clear the sleep. I didn’t hear her come in, but I was also intently focused on my next move, trying my best to shut out the outside world.

After handing her a quick cup of coffee, attempting to keep my composure until I can make a solid plan, I head back to the bedroom to take a shower so I can start my day. Moping around isn’t going to help anything here.

The hot shower helped tremendously to clear my head, letting me see things for what they actually are, even though I don’t have all the pieces yet.

I spend the next couple hours at the gym, pushing myself beyond exhaustion so that my mind will quiet.

I make my way to my favorite spot in the entire world after leaving the gym. Even though my legs feel like jelly, I force them to carry me to the overlook, desperate for the calm it will bring to my soul.

When the air takes on a chill, I resign myself to the facts. I threw my phone out into the river, determined to have this time to myself after finding out that my high school sweetheart has been cheating on me with my childhood best friend. They had been blowing up my phone, so the split-second decision seemed like the only real option at the time. Now it’s time to head home and handle the mess. Unfortunately.

I make my way down the path, doing my best to carefully step over the bigger rocks, which isn’t super easy considering I don’t have much light at this point.

A snapping twig sends me into an immediate panic. Heartrate spiking, adrenaline coursing through my veins, I beg my tired legs to carry me down the path and back to safety before whatever boogeyman is in the woods has a chance to drag me back inside.

Making it back to the parking lot, I hit my knees, gasping for breath, partly from the fear but partly from the adrenaline and everything that has happened today. Rolling my eyes, I force myself slowly back to my feet and make my way home.

It takes nearly an hour to make the short trek home. I drag my feet, dreading the interaction altogether. I still don’t know what to do, but I do know this has to be faced. There’s really no moving forward without it.

Walking through the front door, I wonder if the house is empty. There’s not a single sound, no lights on, no movement. Just as I’m exhaling a sigh of relief, Dawson appears from the kitchen, looking worn and worried.

“Fuck,” he says, voice breathy. The instant change in his demeanor would be heartwarming any other time. He instantly relaxes as I come into his view. “I’ve been so worried about you, Jade. Where have you been? I’ve tried to call and texted you a dozen times.” The words rush out of his mouth as if he can’t quite say them fast enough.

Ignoring him entirely, I push past him into the kitchen. Grabbing a cup, I fill it with ice and water before heading for the living room. I can feel the vice again, squeezing the air out of my lungs. I’ve never been good at this kind of thing.

“We need to talk,” I start, placing the glass on the wooden coffee table and settling into the leather couch.

His face pales instantly as he makes his way to the chair opposite me and sinks into it. All the happiness and hope that was so evident in his features before are washed away and replaced by despair.

“About what?” he asks, feigning ignorance. The look in his eyes gives him away. He’s been waiting for this to come about.

“I think you probably know,” I say, letting the accusation hang in the air between us. It’s tense to say the least. “Where’s Emily?” I ask, finishing off this dance we’ve had going on. There’s no doubt what I want to discuss now.

“Fuck,” he murmurs, scrubbing his hand down his face in frustration. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” His eyes are bouncing between anger and desperation. He doesn’t know how to feel just yet, waiting to see my full reaction.

“I saw the texts,” I state, giving him nothing further. Leaning back into the couch, I squirm in an attempt to get more comfortable, though the discomfort is anything but physical.

“Jade, you’ve gotta understand. It wasn’t what it looked like. Not exactly anyway. I know everybody says that and it’s so damn cliché. But it’s the truth,” he starts, words rushing out as quick as his mouth can move.

“Yes, I cheated on you. We’ve been seeing each other for a little while now. Probably three or four months I guess. It was wrong and shouldn’t have ever happened, but it did. There’s a way bigger issue though. I ended things with Emily when I found out what her actual intentions were, Jade,” he pleads, begging me to understand.

“And what were those, Dawson? To be with your forever, push me out of the picture, take my place with you?” I ask sarcastically, fully knowing the answer to my questions.

“No. Not at all. Well, I mean, yeah, that was part of it. But this is so much more than that. You’re at risk, Jade. You’re not safe. Once I figured that out, I told Emily we were done, but I couldn’t just ignore her entirely or you would’ve known something was up. I can’t stand to even look at her anymore,” he explains, paling to a point I didn’t even know was possible.

“What could’ve possibly been so terrible, Dawson? Sooo much worse than exiling her best friend and destroying her relationship? Doesn’t really get much worse than that I don’t think.”

“Oh, you’d be so surprised. It gets so much worse than that,” he states, locking his gaze with mine. “You’re never going to believe me when I tell you what she said to me. But I swear to you on everything holy that it’s the truth. I don’t have any solid proof since I deleted everything she sent in text and a lot of it was said in person.”