Page 89

And like that, his anger is gone. As much as we’re still working our way back to where our friendship was, I can’t say that Jamie hasn’t been trying. Even this – squeezing a phone call into his busy schedule – is a sign of how far we’ve come.

“I will. How is it in Des Moines?”

I sigh, unable to help myself.

“It’s…fine? I mean, we just lost like seventy percent of our offensive production.”

He laughs at that.

“Yeah, that’s gonna be tough. How’s your knee holding up?”

I appreciate him asking, although I’m not sure exactly what to tell him.

“It’s okay. Good, even? I don’t know, the trainer says it’s in good shape, but it doesn’t feel like it used to, you know?”

He hums, although I realize he doesn’t know – can’t know. But rather than holding that against him, I try to explain further.

“It’s just…there are things I used to do without a second thought that I can’t anymore. Or I can, but it hurts.”

“That sucks.”

I think for a moment before continuing, trying to decide whether to share more.

“Like, I used to love getting on my knees for a guy, you know? There’s fucking nothing better than making someone fall apart.”

Jamie snorts.

“Yeah, I remember.”

I smirk, glad he has good memories of our times together, even though they’re far behind us now.

“But I was with this guy a while ago and he noticed that my knee was bothering me.”

I’m certainly not going to share who noticed; I don’t think we’re quite there yet.

“Oof. I bet that ruined the mood.”

I laugh.

“You’d think it would, right? But he was great about it, just turned it into a challenge for me to find a better position.”

“Which you did?”

I think back to that night, to Finn’s first time getting a blowjob.

“Obviously.”

Jamie laughs.

“Well, with Finn out of your way, I bet you’ll get more practice. I’m guessing he’s kind of been cramping your style.”

I almost wish I had told Jamie more, but I don’t feel right outing Finn like that, especially when he’s just trying to figure this stuff out.

“Nah, he’s great. I miss him, honestly. Plus he’s really chill for a straight guy.”

There’s a pause on his end of the line.

“Oh. I thought…he said you’d told him he should talk to Ethan about how he figured out he was gay. Maybe I was reading more into that…”