Page 28 of Pucking Good Girl

So I wouldn’t be in his shadow for once in my life. Destiny must have a sick sense of humor because despite my attempts to forge my own path away from my big brother, I still ended up where I started. In Mack’s shadow.

And I wish I could say that this applies only to hockey. Of course not. Of course I had to go and fall for his girlfriend.

If I had it bad for Talia before, after last night I have no chance of coming out of this mess with my heart in one piece. It took one kiss to know without one shred of doubt that Talia is it for me. Then I got to taste her, to be inside her, to hold her in my arms. But Mack was there the entire time to remind me that if I want Talia, I have to fight him for her.

If I had one ounce of common sense left in me, I would walk away before it’s too late. This is a dangerous game where there can be no winner. Because, however this ends, someone is going to get hurt. It’s either me or my brother. And yes, I’ve been fighting to get out of his shadow my entire life, but that doesn’t mean I want to hurt him. Our rivalry has always been fierce and it can get bitter, but that doesn’t change the fact that I love my brother. And I know he loves me too.

But I’m also in love with her. Desperately in love with her. And Talia wants me too, but she also wants Mack.

It’s a fucking train wreck waiting to happen no matter how I look at it.

My pulse finally settles, and I sit up. I have sand everywhere, and I don’t want to track it into the condo. Nothing that a quick dip in the ocean won’t fix.

The water is cool this morning, and it gives me a jolt of energy. It does nothing, however, to calm the storm that’s raging inside me.

This thing with Mack has the potential to explode in our faces and wreck everything.

When I say that we’ve been competing our whole lives, I’m not sugarcoating it.

And Talia is just one piece of the complicated puzzle of our relationship.

Dad’s voice echoes in my ears as I wade out of the water.

“Seattle is interested.”

That was the news he opened with yesterday when he called. But I should have known that the other shoe was about to drop. It’s the story of my life, and at this point, I shouldn’t even be surprised when things never go smoothly, no matter how hard I work.

“They really like you, Becks. But they also really like Mack.”

That was hardly surprising. Anyone who has even a basic understanding of hockey can see that players like my brother aren’t just future stars. They’re rare, unique even.

Players like Macklin Shayba are born once every generation if you’re lucky.

That’s a quote from a very reputable sports publication in last year’s special feature on all things hockey.

Of course, I wasn’t mentioned. And of course, I was happy for Mack.

“They are offering a standard ELC (Entry Level Contract) for either two or three years, depending on when they call you up,” Dad had explained. “They are amenable to including a clause that guarantees you ice time too. But what’s even better is the excellent signing bonus and great performance bonuses they’re prepared to offer. That would significantly boost your earnings. Obviously, that’s nothing compared to the sponsors that are already watching us.”

“So they want me too?”

The answer shouldn’t have surprised me.

“I’m not gonna beat around the bush, son.” I knew I wasn’t gonna like what Dad was about to say from the tone of his voice. “They only want to sign one of you. And they decided to watch you both until they make a decision.”

That was the shocker of the century. As if Mack and I didn’t have enough shit to compete on. “I don’t understand, Dad. How is that possible? I’m a right winger and Mack plays on the left.”

“They have a solid center, as you know. And then they have Morozov on the right wing. But he can play on either side; he used to play left wing in his first team. So they only want one winger, and it depends on your performance if it’s going to be you or your brother.”

Dad didn’t have to say it out loud. He thinks they’re going to pick Mack. I have to give him credit for trying to encourage me without being too obvious. But he’s never made a mystery of the fact that he considers Mack his greatest accomplishment. The one who will cement the hockey royalty status of our family. The one who will succeed where he failed in an otherwise impressive career: winning a Stanley Cup.

The walk from the beach to my deck is short, but by the time I get there, I’m a ball of stress.

Looks like running didn’t do the trick this time. I haven’t figured out anything. All I’ve managed is to run ten miles on an empty stomach, and now I don’t have time to eat anything if I want to make it on time to morning skate.

My phone rings before I have the chance to set foot on the deck. It’s Genevieve.

I’m not in the mood to speak to her right now. Especially after what she did to Talia. I refuse the call, but she immediately calls again.