Page 32 of Sorry

SAM

Giddy… I was fucking giddy. We came in our pants together the other day, from me dry-humping him. It was glorious! It should have been mortifying but that was the hottest thing that had ever happened to me. I wanted more of it!

It was like a scene out of the stories I read. I thought stuff like that happened only in books. Never once did I feel awkward around him, apart from when my stupid trauma kicked in. He never made me feel bad about it though and always managed to reassure me. I was so fucking grateful for it.

The guys started ripping up the last of the flooring today. I was alone upstairs and so fucking bored. I haven't touched my phone since that day I had a nightmare. I was convinced that seeing Kyle's messages was what triggered it.

I missed my friends so much. Surely they were worried for me, Liam would too and I hate it. So I decided to buy a new phone. I only installed my LiveTok app on it and apps where I left my book reviews on. I set up my tripod like I used to when I worked at the bakery, and set up to go on the Live for the first time since I ran away. I was about to start on dinner and it was always so much easier to do chores or work when we body-doubled on the Live. I requested to join and they accepted immediately. I had to turn the volume down because everyone started shouting my name and the HI's and ‘Where were you man?’.

Once they settled and I stopped laughing at their antics, I managed to croak out, “Hey guys. How is everyone doing?” Naturally they all had questions and I couldn’t keep skirting around answering it but I also didn’t want to keep lying so I said, “I won’t go into details now but I will give you guys a shortened story. The whole time we have known each other, I have been in a not so nice relationship. I had the opportunity to escape that situation and I had been trying to sort my life ever since. I’m safe now. My grandmother also passed away around the same time, so it’s been hard but I am getting there.”

All of them gave me their condolences and support at the same time.

@Devilique said, “I am sorry you went through all of that S. I wish you talked to us so we could at least support you, if not even help. But I can tell you are doing much better because you look refreshed and you even filled out a bit.”

Alex would have been pleased if he heard that because he was trying to be sneaky to get me to eat more. I’d seen him eyeing me when I ate and the frown he made when I didn’t finish my food. I noticed when he’d tell me he couldn't finish his sandwich and hand it to me, asking me to finish it so we didn't waste food. Or the fact that he had been “accidentally” making too much of his protein shake, he would hand me a glass of it. Luckily, they were delicious and I felt better after drinking them if I was being honest.

We were yet to go to the gym, since that got derailed by the grind session on the couch and then they started the work on the bakery. I wouldn't be able to avoid it much longer.

“OOOO WAIT!” @TristianFinally exclaimed wagging his eyebrows, “You are blushing! You look like you were thinking of something… Someone? SPILL!”

I didn’t know how to answer that. Alex and I haven't defined what we were. I was about to try and change the subject, when Alex walked in the moment I opened my mouth to respond to them. He strode straight towards me not seeing my phone. Shirtless. Sweaty. Hot. In his contractor pants with the tool belt hanging low on his hips.

Stopping in front of me, towering over me he grabbed the back of my neck and crashed his lips on mine. After a few seconds of this unexpected, hot as fuck kiss he lets go of my lower lip with a pop, “Hi.” He said our lips are still touching.

“Hi” I said back, trying to make my lungs work because that was just so swoon worthy.

I forgot I was on live for a split second, until everyone in the live started wolf whistling, and screaming, “WHO IS THAT?!” Crap! Alex's head snapped towards the noise and he saw ten squares filled with people, who were leaning so close to their phones to get a closer look at him. So close you could only see their eyes squinting.

“Errrmmm… Hi?” He waved awkwardly at my phone, then looked at me for explanation with a confused grin.

“Alex. These are my bookish friends. Everyone, this is Alex.”

I got a few conspiratorial looks, some eyebrow wiggles, then someone screamed,

"WE NEED THE DETAILS!”

My ears were burning up. I didn't know what to say so I quickly muted my side of the Live, so they couldn't hear our conversation.

“I am so sorry about that, I didn’t know you were going to come upstairs early.” I felt bad putting him in this situation, that maybe he didn’t want people knowing about our “cuddle times”. I wasn't sure he even said anything to Matt or Jake.

His eyes softened, “It’s ok Pup, I am sorry if I interrupted your time with your friends?”

“No you didn’t interrupt anything, I only just came on to the Live, I haven't spoken to them in a while, so I was going to chat with them while I made dinner.” I tried to reassure him.

“Ok then. I just came upstairs to get us cold drinks and took the opportunity to steal a kiss.” Then he leaned in and “stole” another one. Fucking swoooooon.

“Steal away.” I was smitten with this man.

Everyone from the Live was suspiciously quiet. That's bad knowing they couldn't hear us… but they had been watching. We were both aware that we had an audience, so he waved to everyone and gave me a wink. Grabbing the drinks from the fridge, he gave everyone the view of his round muscular ass that was deliciously wrapped up in his work pants.

I looked towards my phone and not one soul was blinking or breathing. The second I unmuted my phone, they all started shouting questions in unison. “OK! OK! Enough guys that's enough of that,” I laughed.

I went back to cooking and evading all the inappropriate questions. All of my friends had dirty minds, corrupted by smutty books we read. This made me feel whole. I was being put together. I was getting to a point where I didn't think about Kyle, or living in constant fear all the time. In just a few weeks I have been eating better and sleeping better. I still couldn't enjoy it fully, because I was afraid it would all be taken away from me.

CHAPTER 36

ALEX