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I closed my mouth and ground my teeth. The room felt smaller than it was when I walked in, and it was shrinking more by the minute. I was expecting a debate, not a slaughter of my project.
“Excuse me, sir—”
“Drop your angle completely or fail the year.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “You can’t be serious.”
“Does it look like I’m leaving room for discussion? This is not a joke, Dakota. You can listen, or you can lose the career you’ve been working so hard to build.”
A gust of air pushed past my parted lips as disbelief bled into something sharper. This couldn’t be happening. There had to be some common ground. A way for me to expose the truth while making the professor happy.
“You just want me to ignore a relevant story because it’s convenient?”
“I want you to understand what it really is that you’re trying to do.”
“I’m not gullible. I know exactly what I’m doing and what the consequences of my actions are.”
“Do you?” His voice was laced with disappointment and something very close to resentment. “Because what you’re doing isn’t just casting a shadow over a program that has done nothing to deserve it.”
“No, it will expose something that has,” I shot back before he could finish.
His face set into a stern look that made me shrink back in my seat. It was clear that something about this really bothered him, and it was more than just a shadow. Had the donors gotten to him? Was that why he was so against my project?
“You don’t have any proof to back your claims,” he eventually said.
“Not yet, but I’m working on it.”
Professor Alder leaned forward and lowered his voice. “And when you go looking for the proof, you’ll be upsetting people who have far more influence over your future here than you do. Have you taken that into consideration?”
The words hit me like a sledgehammer. I hadn’t thought about it that way, because I didn’t expect it to go that deep. It seemed like this was far more serious than I was prepared for, and that left me with a difficult decision. I looked at Adler, unable to move. I knew there was more to his behavior than he was letting on, and there it was.
“Is that a threat, Professor?”
“It’s a reality, Dakota. You are a student here, a part of the institution. It would be wise for you to remember that.”
I held his gaze as something began to take shape inside my chest. Most people would’ve been afraid of something like that, but in my case, there was no fear. Instead, it was certainty. I knew exactly what I was going to do.
“So you want me to write something more positive,” I confirmed, sounding completely defeated.
“I want you to write something that reflects growth, momentum, and hope. It doesn’t have to be like every other feel-good piece, but at least try to play it safe and remember that the guys on that field have worked themselves to the bone to get to where they are today.”
I wanted to see things the way he did, but the more I thought about his words, the more they felt wrong. How could there be hope if a game was wrought with corruption and deceit? I leaned back and slowly studied him, trying to find answers to the things my brain was unable to comprehend. In that time, only silence stretched between us because I needed to find something that would make us both happy.
“Fine,” I eventually breathed, and I had to admit that I was shocked because it came out a lot smoother than I thought it would. “I’ll adjust my angle.”
He let out a breath, and I could see his shoulders ease. “I’m glad because I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
“Is there anything else you’d like to discuss?” I asked, pressing my notebook to my chest.
“No, that will be all.”
I stood up, straightened my jacket, and readjusted my glasses as I prepared to leave, but when I reached the door, his voice stopped me.
“Dakota… Be smart about this. You don’t want to step on toes that have so much power.”
I didn’t respond. Instead, I stepped out into the hallway, waited for the door to click behind me, and then kept walking. The air felt fresher out here, and my mind was already moving. It was replaying the conversation and picking it apart piece by piece.
The words “kill it” circled like a hungry vulture, and it made me feel sick. People didn’t shut things down because of fear. They did it when there was something worth digging into. And the way he tried to stay controlled and careful about how far he pushed didn’t feel like guidance. It felt like containment.
