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“You don’t even know if what you’re saying is right.”

“Then help me figure it out,” I said, fighting to keep the plea out of my voice.

Trace let out a short, incredulous laugh and shook his head. I didn’t know what it meant, but I hoped he would be willing to work with me instead of against me.

“I wish you could hear yourself,” he said, the pity brimming sharp in his gaze. “You’re pathetic.”

“At least I’m not bullshitting myself.”

Trace didn’t say anything else. It was clear I had talked him into a corner. I had pushed him too hard, and sadly I wasn’t done yet. Something in me wanted to break him completely.

So as he walked away, I said, “And at least I’m not cheating my way into a career.”

18

Trace

I usually enjoyed the banter around the lunch table because I could hide between the overlapping voices and cluttering trays. Today was different.

Connor was arguing with Lucas about something ridiculous, and Ethan occasionally cut in to make things worse, but the noise hadn’t worked in my favor.

Every time my mind had a moment of peace, Dakota’s voice interrupted it, and her harsh words sliced through everything that was left.

At least I’m not cheating my way into a career.

Those were the words that had stuck with me since our last talk. They pushed everything else aside, and weaseled into my brain like a parasite.

I stabbed at my bacon and pushed a few carrots around my plate, unable to find the willpower to put anything down. It was so bad that I barely registered the burned taste of the bacon that I shoved into my mouth to keep suspicions low when Lucas leaned over the table. He grabbed fries from my plate and used them to map out a play that Connor constantly messed up, while Malik watched on with a calm yet guarded expression.

Ethan sat with his face in his hand, pretending to be focused on what they were saying, but I could tell his mind was somewhere else. I really wished I could be somewhere else. Somewhere peaceful, without all this talk of corruption and cheating.

“Trace,” someone said softly, and I instantly knew the voice didn’t belong to the table.

I looked up and saw the same TA who’d pulled me aside last time, now standing a few steps behind me. His posture was casual, but that was it. I could tell how wound up he was. He’d been waiting for a moment to approach me. A moment that wouldn’t seem too suspicious, and that thought alone made my stomach churn.

“What’s up?” I wasn’t as good at sounding nonchalant, but I tried.

The TA got closer, just enough to keep the conversation quiet without making things too obvious. “I’ve got something for you.”

Once again there was no buildup or explanation, just a random approach with something to offer, and it was starting to get weird. This time he didn’t just hand it to me, though. He glanced around nervously, then slid a big brown envelope onto the table, and his fingers lingered for just a fraction too long before he pulled away. I tried my best not to pull a face, but that didn’t go down too well.

“It’s a bit more detailed than the last one. You should focus on the sections that are marked.”

I didn’t touch it immediately because it already looked weird enough, and I didn’t want people to talk.

“Thanks,” I said as I picked it up and shoved it into my bag.

The TA gave me a small nod and vanished into the crowd, so I turned my attention back to the guys around me. That was when I saw they were more focused on the interaction than I had expected them to be.

“What’s that?” Lucas asked all too eagerly.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Uh… It’s just some tutoring stuff. I need help with an exam, so he gave me a list of names of people I can contact.”

“For the English exam?” Connor asked, perking up.

I nodded shyly. The last thing I wanted was to tell the guys that I needed help, but that was definitely better than the alternative.

Lucas smirked. “Damn, check out Prescott. Hitting the books hard. I never thought I’d see the day.”