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I suddenly, inconveniently, realize I’m not thinking like an employee. I’m thinking like a woman who wants him to be good.
Worse, like a woman who already believes he is.
Galina says, “You should go back before Miss Anya wakes.”
I nod. Then I stop. “Galina?”
“Yes?”
“Do you think people can belong somewhere they were only supposed to stay for a little while?”
She studies me for a second. “Yes,” she says. “But they should be honest with themselves when it happens.”
I wish she had given me a more useless answer. I walk back to Anya’s room quietly.
Nikolai is awake when I open the door. He hasn’t moved from the bed because Anya’s still curled between us, one hand tucked under her cheek. His eyes find mine immediately.
He doesn’t ask where I went.
He only watches me climb carefully back onto the bed, and when I settle on the other side of Anya, his hand moves behind her again.
Slowly. Giving me room to refuse.
I look at his hand for a second. Then I take it. His fingers close around mine.
Nothing changes in the room. Anya still sleeps. The movie menu still glows faintly on the television. Morning light still sits pale against the wall.
But I know.
I’m falling in love with him.
23
NIKOLAI
The next night, Elara comes to my room after midnight.
I’m awake when she knocks.
One soft knock, then another, as if she is already regretting it.
I cross the room and open the door.
She stands in the hallway in a thin robe, hair loose around her shoulders, face bare, eyes uncertain in a way I am not used to seeing from her. She looks past me into the room, then back at my face.
“Can I come in?”
I step aside.
She enters quietly, and I close the door behind her. For a moment, neither of us speaks. She stands near the foot of my bed, arms folded around herself, looking at everything except me.
“What happened?” I ask.
“Nothing.”
“Elara.”
She lets out a breath. “I couldn’t sleep.”