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Chapter 33

Roksana

Voices, so many voices, none of them making sense. I wanted to shout, tell them to shut up, to leave me to my grief, but lost in the darkness, I couldn’t utter a sound.

A chill swept over me, then vanished.

The darkness took form. It was nothing I could see, but I was warm and safe in its embrace.

As I snuggled into its warmth, a dragon’s roar shattered my world.

You left me. Your pain, your magic. I felt it all, but you left me. Why, Sanika? Why did you face it alone?

I had to. The Gate is… was dangerous, and I couldn’t risk another part of my heart, I answered. It was easier to think than open my mouth.

‘Put me down. I can walk.’ Tova’s voice held no emotion.

That spurred me to open my eyes. We were back in Tivalaran. The portal was collapsing on the heels of a harried Dark Fae.

‘I’ll take it from here. Thank you for bringing her back.’ Rey’s features appeared above me. He was so weary, but his arms held me tight.

‘What happened? You look like death warmed up,’ he said, planting a soft kiss on my forehead. ‘Give Cinared some reassurance. He was frantic the entire time you were missing.’

A croak was my only reply, and Rey frowned.

‘Ivar, look after the others. I’m taking Roksana upstairs,’ he said. I sighed as I gave up on escaping his concern. ‘Take the dwarf to the healers. Report everything the Care’etavos soldiers say.’

Ivar acknowledged the orders, shouting for a healer while Rey carried me up the steep stairs.

The scent of clover oil wrapped around me, strong but calming. I inhaled, savouring it as I buried my face against his neck. His unruly dark hair tickled my cheeks, easing my tension.

It wasn’t triumph, but more acceptance things would never be the same. All I could do was wait for the consequences of my actions. It wasn’t much solace, but it was enough. It had to be.

Tell me what happened, Sanika. I rendered my aid when you asked. Your pain and despair dragged me from the sky. Why were you drowning in such misery?

Later, I answered, teetering on the edge of that misery, its depths a constant pull on my heart. Only the gentle rocking of Reynard’s long strides kept me from falling back in.

His footsteps on a wooden floor announced our arrival to private rooms. I was barely conscious, but at least I wasn’t afraid. Rey undressed me, while also inspecting my body for injury.

‘I’m fine,’ I muttered when he ran his hands over the curve of my back.

‘No, you’re not, but it’s not something we can fix today.’ The bed bounced when Rey lay beside me, pressing me to his chest. ‘Sleep, love. You need it.’

I closed my eyes, giving in to oblivion, but the dreams that came were restless and filled with voices, insistent and unending.

The light behind my eyelids turned out to be the shining sun. Everything ached; even the roots of my hair protested my existence. I could move, though each shift was weak and unsteady. Still, it was an improvement.

I looked around, trying to identify the source of the unsettling feeling on the back of my neck.

The bed creaked as I changed position. I propped myself up, eyes widening when I recognised the place. Nothing had changed since my previous visit. Inga’s room was still the simple, clean chamber it was before.

‘You’re awake.’ The voice drew my attention from the frescoes on the ceiling.

‘Tova!’ The rapid turn brought a wave of nausea.

He flinched from my outstretched hand. It hung in the air for a moment before I slowly lowered it.

‘The king told me to stay with you. He said we were friends,’ he added, his voice devoid of any inflection. ‘I don’t remember that, and I don’t remember you.’