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Chapter 10

“Ican’t believe you took your ass all the way up there and didn’t take anybody with you. Are you crazy?” Miesha fussed on the other end of the phone.

“Excuse me, the last time I checked I only had one mother,” Danica giggled, parking her car in the cemetery and grabbing the flowers from the passenger side of the car. “And she and my father both know where I am.”

“Okay, but that doesn’t have anything to do with me. You don’t need to be there on your own.”

“Yes, I do.” Danica assured her. “This is something that I have to do for myself.”

“Did you tell Tucker?”

“Yes, and he was all for it.”

“Girl, I need whatever prayer it was that you used to find that man, because he’s the closest thing to perfect. He even has Daddy on his side, and that’s next to damn impossible.”

“No, it’s impossible to get Daddy to like any of those bums that you bring around, because they’re exactly that, bums.”

“You know what, I don’t have to take this abuse, goodbye, hoe.”

Miesha ended the call, making Danica giggle as she stuffed her phone into her purse and continued on her way to Amad’s grave. She and Tucker had been seeing each other regularly for weeks, and the more time passed, the less guilty she felt for allowing someone else into her life, but a large part of her knew that she couldn’t fully move on without closure. Danica had been toying with the idea since the conversation she’d had with her siblings, but only recently did she have the courage to act on it.

Stopping in front of his headstone, Danica sank to the ground and sighed heavily.

“Hey, you,” she said, removing the old flowers from their place and setting up the new arrangement. “I know this is the first time that I’ve been here in a while, and if you’re looking over me the way I think you are, then I’m sure you know why.”

Tucking in her bottom lip, Danica paused to try and get her thoughts together.

“When you left me, I was a mess. I was lost, confused, angry. Nothing made sense to me. I couldn’t figure out why God would even bring you to me just to snatch you away.” She paused again, clearing her throat. “But lately, I’ve been thinking that maybe all of that pain was for a reason. I think I had to wade through everything that happened between you and I, to be strong enough to help somebody else manage their pain.”

A smile crossed her face as Tucker’s face materialized in her brain. “He’s a little damaged, but he’s also very sweet, and I think that you would like him for me.”

Wrapping her arms around her legs, Danica pulled them into her chest as her eyes filled with tears. “I don’t want you, or anybody else, to think that I don’t love you anymore, because I do. But I have to let you go, Amad, and I think I’m ready to do that now.”

For the next few hours, she sat in front of his grave talking about any and everything under the sun. It wouldn’t be her last time visiting him, but she knew that the next time she came, there wouldn’t be such a heavy burden weighing on her shoulders.

Danica was to a point where her healing process could truly begin, and it felt damn good to her soul.

The forty-five minute drive seemed to take her no time at all, and in a last minute decision, she decided to stop by the station to let Tucker know in person that she was back. Her foot didn’t even tap the break hard enough to stop the car when she noticed him standing outside talking to a woman.

She thought nothing of it until the woman flung her arms around his neck and kissed him. Gasping loudly, she pressed the gas to continue driving, thankful that it was dark outside, and would hopefully keep him from noticing her car. Tears clouded her eyes, and her chest heaved in and out rapidly.

How could she have been so stupid to believe that someone like him would only have one woman in her life?

Suddenly, she was second guessing everything the two of them had been doing. Pushing her head firmly against the headrest, Danica sucked back her tears, refusing to shed any over him. If he wanted to play the bad boy role, then he could do it without her.