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“There’s nothing to see.”

His gaze met hers and he stared at her in silence. “We all have scars. Some of them a harder to see than others.”

Letting out a shaky breath, Octavia slowly lowered her hand. Her cheeks felt on fire as she watched Jude’s gaze run down the hateful scars.

“Will it hurt if I touch them?”

“It’s fine,” said Octavia. “They don’t hurt anymore.” She averted her gaze as his fingers gently brushed across the damaged skin. His closeness and his touch made her insides warm. She liked Jude, more than she cared to admit. She didn’t want her disfigurement to put him off.

“What happened?”

She swallowed. “It was the first wave of the State attack. They targeted the terrorist cell I was working undercover in.”

Jude nodded. “They took out the competition first.”

“That’s right.” Octavia noticed Jude’s hand had remained on her cheek, cupping her jaw, his thumb brushing the scars. That touch made her shiver. “It was like hell had arrived on the doorstep. One minute, we were in this room, discussing an attack on key government officials. The next, everyone in government was dead, and the State were hammering down the door. They blew the place to pieces.”

“And you were in the way?” Jude’s fingers remained on Octavia’s damaged skin.

“I remember little about what happened,” said Octavia. “There was an enormous flash of light and a huge bang. I was knocked out. I woke up buried under rubble and covered in blood. I must have been there at least two days before I came to.”

“Who got you out?”

“I got myself out. A few things were broken, which I mended. But this,” Octavia gestured at her face, “there was nothing I could do. I needed surgery, some professional who could stitch me up and take away the worst of the damage. Of course, there was no chance of that happening.” Tears threatened, and she looked away. She’d never felt so ugly. She was not worthy to be so close to this gorgeous guy. It wasn’t just that he was good to look at, but he understood her. Jude knew her, but this mess of a face would drive him away.

Jude tilted her chin up with a finger. “Look at me.”

Her eyes widened when she didn’t see disgust reflected back at her. She saw something else, something that made her grow warm inside. Was he going to kiss her?

“You must have been in a lot of pain,” said Jude. “That was wrong.”

Octavia felt herself weaken. “I got by thanks to some strong painkillers I found in a pharmacy and a bottle of whiskey. Every time the pain got too bad, I overdosed on both. Part of me hoped I’d never wake up.”

“Don’t say that,” said Jude. “You have a lot to live for.”

She hated herself for admitting it, but there were dark days she’d fought through, days when she’d wished she never opened her eyes again. There had been nothing left for her. At least, there hadn’t been until she’d heard Jude and had learned all about the resistance movement.

“You’re a fighter,” said Jude. “You must be. To set up Flame radio on your own, to avoid being taken by the State, to survive your injuries.”

“It was fight or die,” said Octavia. “I have my training to thank for that. We were told never to give up. No matter how dire the situation, there would always be a way out.”

“Sometimes it feels that way around here,” said Jude. “You will fit right in.”

Octavia nodded, but her memories overwhelmed her. She could almost taste the blood in the back of her throat again. She remembered screaming repeatedly as she’d forced her broken body out from under the debris and dragged herself somewhere safe. Not that anywhere had been safe. She’d survived because she was lucky.

“Maybe this was a mistake.” The words came out shaky as she shook the memories away.

“No, it’s right you’re here,” said Jude. “The scars are a part of you. Don’t hide them.”

“Everyone will think I’m a freak.”

“I’m not talking about the scars on your face.”

She looked up at him and a tear slid down her cheek. “You can’t know me that well.”

“We know each other pretty well.” He gave her a lopsided smile. “We’ve been talking for months. I think I told you all my secrets. You even know about the time I super-glued Heath’s lock and trapped him inside his bedroom, then blamed it on Lincoln. Nobody knows about that.”

Octavia had to smile. They had shared a lot since they’d been in contact. It had always felt like having a magical pen-friend. Someone who lived in another dimension, someone just out of her reach, who she’d never meet. Now she was standing just inches from Jude, and it terrified her.