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“How was the trip?”
“It was a waste of time.”
“Are you salty that someone stole your stamp?” She mocks me.
“I am.” I really wanted it.
“So, Channing deleted Tinder.”
“She’s a smart girl.”
“She texted you to say she was deleting it. I think she wanted you to tell her not to.” Why would I do that?
“Tinder is shitshow,” I reply, keeping my eyes on the traffic. “She’s better off staying away from it. I’ve only been there for a few days and I have seen enough.”
“You’re going to be the male version of a cat lady soon.”
“I hate cats.” I’m not an in-the-house pet person. The horses are great, someone else feeds them and cleans up the shit.
“Dad, you don’t want to be alone forever do you?”
“Why not?”
“Are you secretly dating Selene? It would be weird, please tell me you’re not.”
“And dating someone from Tinder wouldn’t be weird?” I can’t understand that logic.
“She’s my friend's mom.” When she says it that way. “But, back to Channing.”
“Why back to Channing? You fuckers made that the most embarrassing encounter ever.”
“I got her number for you, so you can text her without Tinder.” I might throw my child out of a moving car right now. Murder is the only way to stop them, I’m sure.
“From where?” I am afraid to ask.
“I asked Oakley when I went to choose fabric for my dress.” She says it like it's nothing.
“What exactly did you say to Oakley?”
“That my dad wanted her assistant's number.” She shrugs.
“You need to mind your own fucking business.”
“I just sent it to your phone, you can just save the contact card.” Her fingers slide over the touch screen like second nature. This conversation isn’t one I want to have.
“I wanted to apologize for the way I acted before I left.” It’s important as a parent to admit when you get it wrong. “I was just shocked to hear you’re dating from someone else.”
“It’s okay. I should have told you,” she says. “But are you going to text Channing and ask her out?”
“No. Why is this such an obsession?”
“Because she was giving you thelook at the studio.”
“What look?”
“Dad, you’re not dead inside. The look—” She wiggles her eyebrows and I want to die.
“Put your shit music on, I am not having this talk with my daughter.”
