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The sincerity in his eyes makes me ache when he says softly, “You have no idea how much you’ve healed me, and I’m not just talking about physical wounds. This morning. You were…” His breath catches, and his throat works. “Incredible.”

I can’t hear this. It’s tearing down the walls I just worked so hard to rebuild.

My lip curls back from my teeth, but his firm tone stops me. “No. You’re going to listen to me. I know you’re mad, and I think I’ve pieced together why.” He sighs, and fear grips my heart when his gaze shifts. “I’m not going to defend Torment to you. We both know how she is, and we both know she probably lied about her plans to tell you about your dad.”

My anger roars, and I try to snap, “Of course she did!” But it’s gargled by his refusal to let go of my jaw.

“She did, but I know she regrets wasting time in the park first and not heading straight for you.” He shakes his head roughly. “But that’s for the two of you to figure out on your own. It’s hard, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that I cannot mend your relationship with her. The two of you need to do that on your own. I can’t be the middleman.”

I try to drop my gaze, but he jerks my jaw until I look back up. Arousal and pain mix confusingly within me, but I am powerless to break away. My skin tingles, saliva filling my mouth. He doesn’t hurt me. He won’t. But everything about him in this moment has me completely under his control.

“I want you, Valen.”

I suck in breath. My eyes are too wide, but I can’t seem to regain control of my expression. Lucas slowly sinks down to one knee, careful of the chalk that divides us. He leans forward, his hand still holding my jaw. His lips brush my cheek, and I shiver all over.

He whispers, “It’s why I’m so mad over your letter. I want you so fucking much that it kills me. I can’t stop trying to figure out how to convince you to choose us at the end of this. It’s driving me insane. But I understand you now.”

My breath huffs from me, unable to move as his words sink deep into me.

I can’t hear this. I shake my head, trying to get free, but his lips trail the corner of mine. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful like this. The things I would do to you, V. It would make this morning look like clothes-on missionary in the dark.”

Desire quakes me and I clutch his wrist desperately. I try to say something, but it’s garbled. His moan has my lashes fluttering and arousal pulsing until I’m straining against my slacks. I want him to bend me, snarling, to his will.

Lucas licks into my mouth, and I can’t help it. I open wider with a shiver. He purrs, “Thank you for your undivided attention. I didn’t want my last regret before dying by grimoire to be that you didn’t know how stupidly desperate I am for you.” He laughs, low and sensual.

Oh fuck, now I can’t get that night with the three of us out of my mind. It was a taste when I want a feast. I want weeks and weeks of exploring our bodies, the three of us so tangled that we don’t know who is who anymore.

I gently pry his thumb from my mouth, but he doesn’t move his hand far. His rough, callused hands scrape my freshly shaven jaw. We’re so close, our chests brush together, so I feel the drumming of his racing heart. He breathes me in, and a shiver weakens my resolve until I lean against him. Our lips catch, a pleasurable static cracking when he closes around my lower one, his hold on my chin keeping me there. It’s like a living current lights between us, and we both gasp, tongues touching and kiss deepening.

This is dangerous. So fucking, irresistibly dangerous.

I mean to pull away, to tell him why we can’t be together, but I kiss him instead. My fist twists in his hair and we devour each other. The anger and passion pouring into this kiss are so raw that my moan is more of a sound of anguish than pleasure.

He lets go of my face to wrap his arms firmly around my middle, bringing our heated bodies tightly together. He’s just as hard as I am, and our hips shift, desperate to relieve some of the pressure.

I’ve gotten the pleasure of taking his strong body, and now I ache to feel what it would be like in the reverse. He’d promised such delicious things at the end of that night with the three of us. I want to be on my stomach, my leg drawn up so he can hold me tight, thrust into me so deep, so I can’t feel anything but his warm body on mine. I want it slow and achingly tender. I want him to kiss me softly while he makes love to me, and I want to feel Astoria beneath me.

My heart throbs and eyes sting. I can’t do this, or else I won’t survive it when they leave me.

I rip my mouth from Lucas’. I pant and attempt to make my tone firm, but only manage to sound desperate. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t you understand? None of it matters.”

His eyes search me, and his crooked smile has my heart skipping. “You want me.”

“For the love of the dark Weave, yes! But it doesn’t matter.”

He hums, and his nose brushes mine. “I adore you as well.”

My heart nearly explodes, and my anger rises at my own traitorous reaction. I scoff and stand, releasing his hair as I do. “You need to work on your reading comprehension if that is the only part of the letter you remember.”

It’s a mistake. My erection is in his face, and he stares at it before those honey eyes flick up to meet mine with a grin. “You’d be surprised how patient I can be. I’ll wait for you, Valen. However long you need to realize the right choice is to run with us.”

He needs to stop before I go mad. I snarl, “Your hearing also needs improvement.”

I go to step away, but he grabs my belt buckle and yanks me back before him. I gasp, pleasure thrumming through me. My hands snarl in his hair, holding his head in a firm grip, but he doesn’t move. I look back down at him. He smiles, his eyes dancing. “I think I’ve made my point.”

My face heats, and he slides smoothly to standing. I hate that he’s taller than me, even if it’s only by a few inches. It forces me to look up, which lessens the formidability of my glare. He cuffs my chin, and I snap at his hand when he adds, “Now let’s go break into Torment’s stronghold. Then she can rage at us both for nearly giving in to temptation again without her.”

“Why do you call her that?” It’s a useless question that doesn’t matter, but I can’t seem to keep it inside me.