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“I don’t know,” she whispered, locking her arms around his neck. She surrendered then, not wanting to fight the pull of this man, the blazing heat of their attraction. “I can’t think, Jonathan.”

In that moment, she knew she was going to be dragged into her bedroom and finally have mind-blowing sex with the man of her fantasies. She had nothing left inside to shore up her defenses. The whole evening spun away, and when he tipped her chin up, she stared deep into his eyes, held there by a burning intensity that drove her breath away.

Then he was stepping back, turning away as he gulped a deep breath. She blinked, not understanding, while he re-knotted his tie and righted himself. “Alyssa, you mean more to me than a quick night. I won’t do that unless you want to commit to trying to be with me.”

“Like as your girlfriend?”

He winced at her high-pitched tone. “Yeah, as my girlfriend. I want a chance to show you how good we can be outside of the office. But I need you willing to try. And if I take you to bed tonight, you’ll shut down on me.”

Stunned, she realized he was right. She didn’t do well with impulsive acts that she’d regret in the morning. The fact that he’d known and been able to stop them both told her she was more deeply involved than she’d ever thought.

He was a man she could so easily love if she let herself fall.

“I don’t know.”

“I do. So I’m going to head home, take a cold shower, and see you in the morning. And we’ll take this step by step, slowly. But after that kiss, don’t lie to me and say it’s not worth it.” He reached out and ran a finger down her cheek, smiling. “Good night, Alyssa.”

He walked out and left her sexually frustrated, scared out of her mind, and something much, much worse.

Hopeful.

six

She couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss.

Alyssa stood to the side, positioned close to Jonathan’s bodyguards and advising team while the press conference came to a close. He’d dazzled them all again with his confidence, strength, and passionate belief in issues that would only help the state. Education. The homeless. Restrictions on vaping. He wasn’t a fan of legal marijuana, but the current governor was, so that was an issue he might need to compromise on. His movie-star looks only helped, giving him higher approval with both men and women. She knew appearance was a poor condition for being a good leader, but he’d been blessed and used it to his advantage.

She now knew, up close and personal, how those looks could affect a woman. His strength and piercing gaze, his firm mouth sliding so expertly over hers, heating up every inch of her body. Yet he wasn’t a player, and not interested in bedding a long line of women—which would be easy with his position. No, he was moral from his political view to his soul, and that only made it harder to fight him.

“Who will you be taking to the Friends of Firefighters Gala, Mr. Mayor?” a reporter asked. “Are you still recovering from breaking up with Savannah Winters?”

Alyssa winced. Savannah was the latest television star who’d been seen a few times with Jonathan at social functions, but she’d moved on to begin dating a famous movie star. The press spun it as a cruel dumping and painted Jonathan as heartbroken for a full week of gossip. Alyssa knew it’d been nothing—they’d been friends—but having his love life pulled apart and analyzed was difficult to watch.

Hmm, the reporter was Diana Delaney. She’d been assigned to cover the mayor’s office by a rag of a paper, but so far, she’d written quite fairly about Jonathan compared to what she penned about some other public officials. The lack of privacy was criminal and ridiculous, but Alyssa knew it was the price paid for political office. Fighting it didn’t help, and accepting it with grace and firm boundaries was the only way to move forward.

“Does the city of New York really care about my lack of a dating life?” he teased, those blue eyes sparkling. He was adept at playing to the crowd, and a titter of laughter rang out. “Savannah is happy, and I wish her all the best. We’re still good friends.”

“Just curious. It’s been how long since you’ve been married? Five years?”

His face suddenly tightened. A wary silence fell over the crowd as cameras flashed. “Yes,” he finally said in a clipped voice. “But there’s no time limit on the grief of losing a spouse, is there?”

Alyssa drew in a sharp breath. His late wife was always a vulnerable spot, but instead of jealousy, only tenderness rose within. He loved deeply, and he didn’t choose often. If he loved her, it’d be with everything he had. Forever.

Her knees shook at the image of being able to claim him as hers. He deserved a woman who was strong and brave and could stand before a firestorm with her chin held high. Was she capable of being that type of partner? Or was it just a hopeless fantasy? Could she stand being in the public scrutiny day in and day out, even for him? Would she lose her identity to the power of his?

Her entire life revolved around being pushed into the spotlight against her will. And she couldn’t live with herself if she affected his run for governor. The doubts had kept her from moving forward with him since the night of the kiss. He didn’t push, but she sometimes saw the question burning in his gaze when he looked at her. When the day ended, and they were going their separate ways, he’d stop at her desk and stare at her in silence, waiting.

So far, she hadn’t been able to answer. Not yet. She needed more time to figure things out.

The reporter’s voice rose in the air amidst the crowd. “I apologize, Mr. Mayor.”

Startled by the apology, she watched Jonathan visibly soften. “Accepted. Let’s just say I won’t be on the Bachelor anytime soon, okay? Now, let me get back to work. Thank you.”

Alyssa fell into place within the procession as they left the press room.

The hours flew by in a frenzy of tasks and meetings until she was finally stumbling toward home. She couldn’t wait to open the new political memoir that’d just hit the stands, sip a glass of wine, and cuddle under her favorite blanket. Every muscle in her body hurt from being on her feet nonstop, but the day had been productive, and a buzzing satisfaction zinged through her, giving her a natural high.

She’d just reached her place when she noticed the familiar black car waiting at the curb.