Page 74

“That’s right. She loved finding new spots to sketch. Tonia was always exploring. Wandering off, deeper into the forest than was safe. I would yell at her for it when she got back, but she had a mind of her own. She’d do it again and again. Until one day, she came back from the forest and she was… different.”

Randa hesitated, her hand on the knob to her room.

“Tonia stayed in her bed for about a week. Wouldn’t eat. Wouldn’t talk to anyone. When any of us touched her, she’d stiffen up or shout or jerk away. I could hear her sobbing all hours of the night.” He stared at Randa’s back. “Finally, I had had enough, and I confronted her. Demanded to know what was wrong. After an hour or so, she told me that she’d been raped.”

Randa’s shoulders tensed, but she still said nothing.

“Three men had cornered my baby sister by a river and raped her.” Kahn leaned forward, his eyes on Randa’s still form. “And she didn’t tell me. I guess because she was afraid I’d be mad at her for disobeying, in the first place. She blamed herself, even though it was not her fault. It could never be her fault that evil men hurt her. It was their fault. No one else’s.”

Silence.

“So after that, I held Tonia and told her that I loved her. That I would help her heal. That those men would not get away with hurting her. I slept on the floor of her room every night until she felt strong again. It took a long time, but Tonia didn’t give up.”

“Did they arrest the men who raped her and Banish them?” Randa asked, still not turning around.

“No.”

“They never found them?”

“No.”

A pause. “Did you find them?”

“Yes.”

She glanced at him over her shoulder.

Kahn stared back at her without blinking.

Randa nodded. “Good.” She cleared her throat and looked away, again. “Good night, Kahn.”

“Good night, Randa.”

She opened her door and stood at the entrance for a beat. “Maybe your sister wasn’t afraid you’d be angry at her for disobeying you. Maybe she was ashamed that she made the choice to live.”

Kahn tilted his head, listening.

“Sometimes you have to decide whether to fight and die… or submit and live.” Randa continued, her back still turned to him. “That’s not easy to explain. Especially to you.”

“Why especially to me?”

“Because it would be hard for someone so physically strong to understand what it’s like to be overpowered. For someone so uncompromising to know what it’s like when you realize that it’s surrender or death. …And that you want to live.”

“Surviving is the only choice.” Kahn assured her flatly.

“Isaacs told me that, too.”

“He’s right. You think I give a shit about the fight Tonia put up? I only care that she came home to me and I had a hundred more years with her. She did what she had to do to get out of there alive. That’s all that matters.”

Randa swallowed hard and turned towards him, a film of tears covering her eyes. “It’s just… you blame yourself, when you’re forced to…” She stopped and swallowed again. “You think maybe you should have fought harder, or thought of a way out, or that you did something to bring it all on. Or if your powers weren’t so wrong…”

“No.” Kahn interrupted. “You should’ve done exactly what you did. You should have survived. No matter what, you survive, Randa. Then you come home, tell me what happened, and I help you kill everyone who hurt you.”

Her damp eyes met his, searching.

Kahn held her gaze, willing her to believe him.

“Parald’s already dead.” A tear slipped past her guard, trailing down her cheek.