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Cass huffed a laugh. “Do you even have cake?”

“Nope,” Ash said, trying for a small smile. He stuck the key in the lock and pushed open the door to his apartment. “But she’s adamant we do and that that’s what’s for dinner. And dessert.”

“Yes!”

The little bit of levity from Bri’s declaration of their dinner plans seemed to vanish when Ash motioned for Cass to enter the apartment ahead of him. Tension creeped back into his shoulders as he followed his boyfriend and niece inside and shut the door behind them.

Bri immediately took off toward the bathroom, yelling “I go potty!” as soon as Cass set her down. With a grimace, Ash lowered the diaper bag to the floor next to the front door.

“She’s probably not actually going to go, but just in case . . .” Ash shrugged. “I’ll be right back. Um . . . make yourself comfortable?”

He hated how awkward that sounded, but Cass just nodded stiffly, and so Ash turned and headed after Bri.

Several minutes later, Ash helped Bri finish drying her hands and then followed her back out of the bathroom. He paused at the end of the hallway, shoving his hands in his pockets to keep them from shaking. Bri had hurried on ahead and climbed up into Cass’s lap. She smiled brightly as she stood on his thighs so she could lean in and smell the roses Cass had brought, which now sat in a glass vase on the table. Cass was talking to her quietly, and she nodded with a contemplative “Oh, yes, yes, I see.”

Ash smiled at that, even though he had no idea what Cass had said. And when Bri turned and wrapped her little arms around Cass’s neck and gave him a big kiss on the cheek, Ash’s chest tightened.

God, he didn’t want to lose this. He couldn’t.

He cleared his throat and took a step forward, and as soon as Bri saw him, her face broke out in a huge grin. She climbed down off Cass’s lap and then raced over and grabbed Ash’s hand.

“There six fwowers! I count them! See!” She tugged Ash over, crawled back up onto Cass, and pointed to each of the flowers as she counted. “One, two, three, four, five, six! Six!”

“Wow, yeah, I see. What wonderful counting,” Ash said, trying to infuse as much enthusiasm as he could into his words. He knew he was falling short, but thankfully, Bri didn’t seem to notice. She clapped and laughed and then, without Ash even asking, slid down off Cass’s lap and ran over to her toy box, which she promptly dumped over.

Ash kept his eyes on her, even though he wasn’t really watching her. He just couldn’t move again; he was too scared to face Cass, not quite ready to hear whatever it was Cass had to say.

Still, he felt the second Cass stood up and shifted closer to him, and when Cass tentatively set his hand on Ash’s back, Ash closed his eyes and dropped his chin, his body shuddering with relief. Cass rubbed his lower back gently, and Ash took a slow, deep breath as his racing heart started to calm.

“Sorry to just show up like this,” Cass said quietly. “I, uh . . .” He paused, and Ash felt him trembling again. “I knew I needed to talk to you in person, not over the phone, especially after . . . um, after the last few days.”

With a short nod, Ash finally made himself turn around, his palms coming to settle on Cass’s chest. Through the thin cotton of Cass’s shirt, Ash could feel Cass’s heart hammering. He frowned and stared at his hands for several seconds before lifting his eyes.

Cass wasn’t smiling; in fact, Ash thought he could almost see tears accompanying the worry and shame in Cass’s eyes. He sucked in a breath and looked back at his hands.

“It hurt. A lot. That you . . . that you didn’t answer or call me back or . . . or anything,” he said, forcing the words out. “I didn’t know what to think. I . . . I actually still don’t know what to think.” He dropped his hands down and shoved them back in his pockets, fighting the sudden urge to pull away altogether.

“I know.” Cass’s voice was filled with pain.

God, they were both hurting so much.

Ash’s jaw quivered, and he pursed his lips and blinked back tears. “Why, though? What happened? What did I do? Why . . . why wouldn’t you just talk to me?”

Even though Cass had said he was here to talk—hell, he’d flown up here, Ash assumed, and must have been sitting outside of Ash’s apartment, waiting for hours for him to get home—he seemed tongue-tied now, unsure and scared to speak. He frowned and brought his hands up to rest on Ash’s upper arms, and he squeezed gently.

Then he finally said, “It started a while back, actually.” He lowered his hands and blew out a breath. “Um, can we sit? Here or on the couch, wherever you’re more comfortable. I need to tell you everything.”

Ash nodded, and he glanced over at where Bri sat, playing by herself on the floor. She had stacks of blocks—each stack three blocks tall—neatly lined up in front of her, and she was babbling to herself as she went, methodically adding one more block to each stack. He swallowed hard and then tipped his head to the table.

“Maybe we sit here?”

“Sure, yeah.”

Together, they moved to the table and sat. Then, in awkward speech punctuated by anxious pauses and jumbled stuttering, Cass began to explain himself.

“Last month, remember when my mom had to go to the hospital?”

Ash nodded. “She had leg pain?”