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“It’s nothing. I’m babbling. Ignore me.” I pause, tucking my insecurities away so I don’t wreck his surprise and hard work.

“No, tell me.” He grabs my face so I can’t look away.

“Did you get me cum drunk so you can interrogate me?”

“Remember, I don’t play fair, I play to win.” He rubs a circle on my chest, titillating my brain.

“What are you winning?” I stretch to get my blood moving to satisfy him.

“Only the best prize in the universe. You.” Sky plants a chaste kiss on my lips. “But don’t change the subject. You’ve been off since we got home.” He holds up his hand. “And I’m fully aware I got you off.”

“You did. You’re more than I deserve after having my head up my ass for so long.” I crawl into his lap, pinning him down and shushing him when he objects. “I’m waiting for you to decide being with me isn’t worth all the complications. It’s not rational. I get that.” My voice rises with uncertainty. I’m not sure I’d be as forgiving as he has been or be selfless enough to carve out a huge section of a home for him.

Sky’s eyes fall shut. “I’m not keeping score or holding grudges.” He sighs. “Guess why I used this room for storage.”

I let him out from under me to straddle me, willing him to keep sharing his secrets.

“It makes no logical sense to use the front room with great street views for storage, but I was hiding. Mainly from self-judgment. I unlearned a shit ton of prejudice. I couldn’t eat and pay rent on a dancer’s salary. A hard fact of life is that most successful dancers have family to pay their bills or they find sponsors. I didn’t set out to be a stripper.”

“I’m an asshole for calling you one at the bachelor party. I apologize.” My chest aches worse than a full-speed hit to the sternum.

“I was desperate and figured I’d do it on the side while I kept auditioning. Through The Q Solutions, I got hooked up with a therapist who guided me to find acceptance in my beliefs and separate them from how we grew up and what other people think.

“Stripping isn’t dirty or shameful. Showing my body while I dance is exhilarating. It’s probably like a runner’s high. My website gave me total control over my creativity and clients. I’m self-made but felt society’s stigma. I piled junk in this room and created my studio in the back so that no one from the street would ever guess what I do. Self-condemnation had me hiding instead of using the logical solution: blackout curtains.” His finger traces my top lip, lingering on the bow in the middle.

“Shame is a hard habit to kick, and it had a deep control over me. The thing about a horrible habit is that it pops up when you least expect it. I’m happy and love my life, but shame messes with my head and plants seeds that you’ll walk away.” He buries his face in my neck. “I renovated this room to face my demons and maybe, possibly, make it harder for you to leave.”

“I’ll never be ashamed of you. Debatably, I’m fucked up because knowing other people watch you, but I’m the only one who can touch you, is a spectacular turn-on. I’m out here worried you’ll realize some other guy is way less complicated.” The admission lifts the anchor weighing on me.

“What is wrong with us? Both scared the other will leave. Is it mommy or daddy issues?” Sky nestles as close as he can get without being in my skin.

“I can’t go back to a life without you. Mommy or daddy issues aside, since I probably have both. Losing you is the worst-possible scenario,” I say in a gross understatement. He’s part of me.

Sky slaps a hand over my mouth. “Do. Not. Invite bad karma in. Promise to talk to me if you—”

“If my people-pleasing tendencies and insecurities fuck up our relationship,” I cut in.

“Mav, your issues don’t scare me. You’re stuck with me. I’m not above velcroing myself to you. Could make hockey tricky, but we’ll work it out.” He laughs, and I suck the sound from him.

“You won’t be so cheerful when I find you a Velcro suit to wear. You can dangle off my chest all day long.” The mental image makes me chuckle.

“Worth it,” he sings at full volume.

“My toes have regained feeling, so it’s time for my cleanup duty.” I yank his pants off before he objects.

Chapter 25

Maverick Maher

Sky’s sweat gives him a shiny glow through the video app. He’s on the new living room couch, but his computer is close enough he takes up most of the screen.

“What should we do for Valentine’s Day? I have a game, but we can do a full celebration the day after.”

Sky pulls his hair into a band off his head. “It’s not a big deal. We can do whatever, but no pressure for it to be super romantic.” He gags, demonstrating his view of the overly commercialized holiday. “Besides, we’re keeping a low profile.”

My smile falls, but I rub my scruff in an attempt to hide how much that low profile hurts. “No, we’re not commenting or confirming we’re a couple, which is completely different. If I had my way, I’d have a press conference the way Jayce did and tell the world you’re my boyfriend.” My light tone disguises my frustration. Sky doesn’t want to be my secret but insists on not confirming our relationship.

“That’s inviting the devil to dinner,” he scoffs.