Page 14
George stilled. “A drive?”
“Yes, in your phaeton. I understand you possess a handsome pair of bays.” Her expression brightened. “Or perhaps we might visit Vauxhall and enjoy the entertainments. I should like that enormously.”
A chill spread slowly through his chest. “I thought you preferred our encounters to remain discreet.”
She gave a dismissive little laugh. “Surely you do not imagine a drive through Hyde Park or an evening at Vauxhall would compromise me?”
“Not in the least.”
Her gaze searched his face with unmistakable curiosity. “Then why do you look so guarded? One would think I had asked you to marry me.”
When had taking a lover become so complicated? George had always considered such arrangements straightforward. Two people desired each other, indulged that desire, and parted satisfied, without promises or expectations beyond mutual pleasure.
“Are you looking for a husband?” he asked abruptly.
She stiffened. “Must you be so direct? It is hardly gentlemanly.”
His mouth curved. “I shall take that as a yes.”
“I have been widowed for three years. I am perfectly entitled to take a lover if I wish.”
“And is that truly all you want? Someone to ease the loneliness of an empty bed?”
“Why should it matter that I am considering remarrying?”
“Because I wonder whether you hope I might be that man.”
She studied him for several moments before drawing a breath. “And if I do?”
George rose and bowed. “You are a wonderful woman, Victoria. Beautiful, witty, and wealthy. Any number of gentlemen would be delighted to marry you.”
“But not you,” she said softly.
“I have no desire to marry at present, and I rather doubt you would care to wait another decade for me to reconsider.”
Sadness flickered in her eyes, and she lowered her gaze. After a moment, she drew a steadying breath and looked up at him again.
“I was not fortunate enough to have a child during my marriage, and I find that I want more than a fleeting affair. I should like to have children, and perhaps even know what it is to be loved.”
She rose abruptly and slipped her arms around his neck, lifting her face in unmistakable invitation. George was surprised to discover that he had no desire to kiss her. Until tonight, he had fully intended to seduce Victoria, but knowing she hoped for love, marriage, and children had changed matters considerably. He would not selfishly encourage expectations he could never fulfill. He had walked away from similar liaisons before without regret, preferring his pleasures uncomplicated.
“Victoria…”
“You know you want to,” she insisted, lifting her chin stubbornly.
Yet the desire he had anticipated feeling was inexplicably absent. His cock seemed to have gone dormant, along with every inclination to take her upstairs to the private rooms. George nearly laughed at the absurdity. Perhaps he was simply exhausted. He had been awake since the previous day, reviewing estate ledgers, investments, and parliamentary motions his father wished him to present in the Commons. Any sensible man would be weary after so long without sleep.
“Knowing you want more, I cannot be your lover.”
Her eyes crinkled with a smile. “I like that about you. Another man would have taken me to his bed without considering my feelings. You are a libertine, George, but such an interesting one.”
He gently disengaged her arms from his neck. “Allow me to escort you home.”
She stepped back. “No. I have plans of my own.”
George accepted her answer and took his leave. Though he had scarcely spent an hour at Aphrodite, exhaustion had overtaken him, and he wanted nothing more than his bed.
After collecting his coat, hat, and gloves, he stepped into a downpour heavier than when he had arrived. His coachman hurried forward with an umbrella, but George waved him aside and strode through the rain to his carriage.
