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Gah, this man is trying to kill me with how sweet he is! And I tell him so with a kiss to his cheek.
Connor chuckles. “Don’t die on me yet; I just got you back. Besides, it’s been a while since I’ve made these, probably not since that day in high school, so they could totally suck.”
“It’s pancakes and apples. I doubt you could mess it up too badly,” I say, plucking a fluffy pancake off the top of a small stack resting by a fruit bowl. The first bite is like a time machine. It whisks me back seventeen years.
To a hopeful girl excited for her first date.
Then the reality of what happened after sets in, and the bite turns dry, sticking in my throat.
“Hey, what’s wrong? They’re not that bad, are they?”
Struggling to swallow, I shake my head and down a sip of orange juice from the breakfast tray. “No, they’re perfect. You’re perfect. It’s me.”
His forehead wrinkles. “I don’t understand.”
“I ruined everything back then because I was too scared to stand up to my parents. We could have had this years ago, if not for my cowardice.”
“Hey, hey…” He cups my cheek and draws my chin up so our eyes meet. His are gentler than I deserve. “We were both young. Who knows what would have happened if you defied your parents? Maybe we would have flamed out after that first date.”
“Or maybe we’d be celebrating our own vow renewal alongside your brother and Davie,” I point out.
Connor shrugs and presses a kiss to my bare shoulder. “It doesn’t matter. Everything worked out the way it should have. No use worrying about what might have been when what we have right now is far more interesting.”
I groan and tip my head back until it bangs against the headboard with a thump. “Ugh, this is what I mean. You’re too good, and historically, I’ve never been good enough.” Years of failure to stand up for myself, then growing a backbone and still disappointing my parents weighs on my shoulders.
“Hails, talk to me. Are we talking about your parents’ expectations again? Because they are fucking wrong. You’ve always been the smartest, kindest person in the room. You started your own catering business, and it’s kicking ass. If they can’t love and support you, then they are the ones who don’t deserve you—not the other way around. You deserve every good thing life has to offer.”
Maybe he’s right.
Maybe I should stop working so hard for my parents’ approval and just… be.
Be who I am—a woman who does the hard things even when she’s scared. Who has learned to ask for what she wants even when someone else might frown upon it.
“Say it out loud,” Connor commands, cupping my chin so I can't look away from him.
“I deserve every good thing life has to offer,” I murmur. Maybe if I repeat it enough times, I'll start to believe it.
CHAPTER EIGHT
CONNOR
Ranch Bash is a huge success. It exceeds even my high expectations, and while it started as a way to get closer to Hailey, it’s definitely becoming the tradition I sold to Cormac.
“Random question: what happened to your glasses?” I ask after swallowing a bite of the cookie cake Hailey made.
We’re sitting by ourselves at one of the picnic tables laid out on a grassy area behind the main house for a reprieve from the festivities. It's the first real break I've gotten her to take.
“I still have them. I just prefer my contacts most of the time. They make cooking easier, since I'm not constantly shoving them higher on my face, and then having to rewash my hands a million times.”
“I never considered what a pain in the ass that would be.”
Hailey nods, but before she can elaborate, an older couple approaches.
I don’t recognize them from any of the ranch employees’ families, but I suppose I could have missed them. A lot of people showed up for the party.
Their eyes drift over me to land on Hailey who stiffens in her seat. All the relaxation I'd coaxed out of her gone in a second.
“Hailey! There you are!” The woman claps in excitement as she and her husband sit on the bench across from us.
