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The exact wrong thought to enter my head right now. All my earlier thoughts slide back in, and I stiffen. He tightens his arms around me, refusing to let me pull away.

“No escaping this time, lisichka.” He sounds far too pleased about that. “We need to talk if we’re going to make this work. It can’t all be sex.”

I squeeze my inner walls around him, making him grunt and moan. “It’s worked pretty well so far, pet, don’t you think?”

“Lane… if you want to make this work with me, it can’t just be sex.”

I know he’s right, but that involves… feelings.

Feelings are not my thing. Action is my thing. Violence, definitely. This, not so much?

I sigh. “Why are we ruining a nice moment?” I try to lift away from him, but he tightens his grip.

“Because I can tell you want to run, and that means I have to chase you again. We’re going to make this work, Lane, but we have to communicate to see it happen. And that also means you can’t run when things get hard.”

“I don’t run.”

Of course I want to run. What rational person wouldn’t? This is an overload of emotion that I’m not ready to handle yet.

Might not ever be able to. And that irritates me. I’ve wanted this. Wanted him. I knew what that meant. And now that it’s here, I can’t handle it?

Pathetic.

“Correct, you drug me, or tie me to the bed and set it on fire, then you run.”

Oh, he has jokes? I roll my eyes. “That was your own fault, and you know it. You left another woman’s clothes in your closet. Let another woman in your bed.” Which reminds me… “And that’s not going to happen again, is it, pet?”

“For someone who has a bunch of cameras in my room, you clearly weren’t watching them, because you’d know that no woman has been in my bed since that time in my office. And you’d have also seen Zakhar was the one to do that to see if he could lure you out.” He grins. “But it’s nice to know your jealousy hasn’t lessened over the years. After I got done being pissed, I realized how much I liked knowing you were obsessed with me.”

“I don’t sit and watch the cameras every damn second, Ilya.” I sniffle. Damn it, I should have kept that shit to myself. And I’m pissed at myself for letting my emotions get the better of me.

“Maybe not, but I’m sure you have a way of being notified if someone is in the room with me. You’re smart like that. Speaking of which, are you going to tell me where you’ve hidden that camera?”

“Nope.” And lose my edge? Absolutely fucking not.

“Mm-hmm. We’ll work on that later then. Right now, we’re going to talk about what is making you want to run from me again.”

“I never said⁠—”

“It’s all over you, lisichka. We came in here and something shifted. I could feel it before I looked at you. So, until I know what it is, I can’t figure out how to fix it.”

“It’s not something to fix, Ilya,” I snap, irritated and antsy all over again. I pull away, breaking free from his hold, and even the feel of him falling out of me doesn’t have the pleasurable thrill it always does. He grips the edge of the tub, looking casual, like he doesn’t have a worry in the world, but I can see the tension. The way he’s bracing himself to move.

I move to the other end of the giant tub—seriously, did he have orgies in here before, because who needs something this big?—needing the space. He messes with my head being so close to me. I need to think.

“Then why don’t you explain it to me?”

How the hell am I supposed to explain any of this? I don’t talk or express my feelings. That was beaten out of me a long damn time ago. It’s not going to change now.

“I’m not doing a whole story time, Ilya.” I keep my voice matter-of-fact, controlled. Yes, that’s exactly what I can handle. Facts. That’s what I need to focus on. “I’ve been working, and your idea to bring me here before I was ready for you to catch me means I’m not going to be comfortable here. Simple. We don’t need to dissect it.”

“Even if I waited until you were ready, as you put it, we both know that you’ll never be ready for this, Lane. How does an assassin just become something else after it’s been her entire life?”

Absorbing the words and the hurt of what they mean, I push it down. It’s nothing I haven’t already thought of. “And what did you expect me to become? Is that what this discussion is about to be, Ilya? What you expect from me?”

His eyes sharpen, but his posture doesn’t change. “Don’t be twisting my words, lisichka. Nothing I’m saying is incorrect, and none of it means that I want you to leave or be something else that you’re not. I’m merely saying that even though you think I don’t, I understand what you’re facing. Maybe you thought you’d have more time to figure it out, but life, a normal one anyway, doesn’t give you that luxury. And you will never be in the position to understand it. Not after everything.”

“And you think you know me? Actually know me?”