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“What is the alternative, oh wise one?”
“Proceed with your plans. Marry Elizabeth now! Delay your wedding journey for a week at the most, but for heaven’s sake do not put your life on hold waiting for Anne to decide to recover.”
“I do not believe Anne is pretending. I was there! I will not abandon Anne when she needs me most. Nor will I marry Elizabeth when I am consumed with worry over Anne’s well-being. Elizabeth deserves more than that. She deserves better than I am able to offer just now.”
Darcy was on his way to look in on Anne, when he came across Elizabeth, who placed herself directly in his path.
“Hello, stranger,” Elizabeth’s visage offered far more than her words conveyed.
“Elizabeth, I know we have much to discuss,” he offered apologetically.
“Indeed, we do. Thus, I am standing here in the hallway. I mean to spend the rest of the day with you, Mr. Darcy.”
“Elizabeth,” he began, “not today. Anne—” Darcy started to say before Elizabeth intervened.
“You have hired an army of nurses to care for Anne. Meanwhile, no one is looking after you; least not yourself. I mean to do just that, starting now,” Elizabeth insisted.
Darcy opened his mouth to form an objection, but Elizabeth placed a silencing finger on his lips. “I refuse to accept no as an answer. Come with me.”
A quarter of an hour later, Darcy and Elizabeth strolled together along a winding path bordering a quietly flowing stream. Occasionally, Elizabeth cast a glance towards him and wondered what had become of her passionate lover. His hands were tightly clasped behind his back. His countenance was crumpled. His mind seemed miles and miles away. He barely noticed when she laced her hands through his arm and rested her head thereupon as they walked.
It was destined to be a far greater challenge than she had envisioned. Elizabeth broke the inexcusable silence. “Mr. Darcy, I do not mean to make light of the pain you surely must be suffering; however, I was there, you know. You have nothing to feel guilty about.”
Darcy wondered to himself, Why must others insist on telling me how I should feel during this time? I know their intentions are good. No one understands. It was his burden and his burden alone. He did not mean to share it with anyone, not even Elizabeth; especially not Elizabeth.
“Elizabeth, I do not wish to speak of any of this.”
Elizabeth did not argue. They continued to walk in silence and soon came across the spot of a cosy picnic she had arranged through his staff. It was a delightful prospect, exactly as she had in mind. Elizabeth pulled him along by the hand and urged him to sit on the large blanket arranged on the ground.
Darcy was forced to shed his mask of remorse and despair in response to Elizabeth’s warm gesture. After studying the contents of the baskets and retrieving a bottle of wine and two glasses, he endeavoured to make amends for his aloofness.
“Thank you, my love,” he began, “I apologise for my sour mood of late. I am especially sorry for the havoc the situation with Anne has wreaked on our wedding plans.”
“I accept your apology, Mr. Darcy, and I have tried to understand, believe me, though it has been rather difficult at times.”
“I know,” said he, “which brings to mind a matter which I have given some thought.”
“What is it?” Elizabeth asked as she set the preparations of fresh fruit aside, and beheld him intently.
How he adored her. He missed her. His gaze rested on her tempting lips, but alas, he turned away. How can I even think to kiss her, when poor Anne clings to life pursuant to my cruelty?
“I received a letter from my uncle, Lord Matlock. Lady Catherine continues to recover from her recent bout with ill-health. However, she is not yet fit enough to travel. Lord and Lady Matlock will come to Pemberley in her stead.” Darcy took Elizabeth’s hand in his and caressed it gently. “You should not have to suffer the indignities that are sure to come with my uncle’s arrival. I think it will be best if Georgiana, Ben, and you return to town.”
Elizabeth attempted to withdraw her hand. Darcy would not allow it.
“Is that what you want, Mr. Darcy?”
“I wish to protect you from what might be a long drawn out wait, as Anne’s situation remains unchanged.”
“Do you wish for me to leave Pemberley?”
“I never wish to be parted from you.”
“Good, for I shall never leave you. You might as well accustom yourself to that fact.”
“I would much rather you stay. However, my guilt is compounded when I think of how my attendance to Anne comes at the expense of Ben and you.”
“You must allow me to worry about such matters. Ben misses you to be sure, and only you can fill that void.” Elizabeth covered their joined hands with her free hand. “Allow me to share this burden with you. What this situation calls for is far more objectivity and fewer guilt-ridden obligations.