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“Good … Uh … Yeah, bathroom is over there but let me get something to clean you up.”

“Don’t worry. I got it.” I shook my head, refusing his aftercare, knowing it would be too intimate for me.

After washing up, redressing, and dancing around the fact that I was getting the hell out of dodge, I could tell that Hunter had something he wanted to say but decided better of it.

“Well, I should get going.”

“I can give you a ride,” he offered.

“Don’t worry about it. Already ordered an Uber.” I smiled sweetly.

As I started to walk past him, he pulled my arm, forcing me to turn around. “I had a good night, Andi. Can I text you sometime?”

“Mhmm,” I answered with a slight nod, not being able to fully form the words to reject him just yet.

It would be easier over a text message.

Hunter’s grip slipped from my arm, allowing me to walk myself out.

The drive back to my apartment felt torturously slow, but once I finally got home, and my head hit the pillow, I willed myself not to overthink anything. Tomorrow was a new day, and the next time I slept with someone, it would wash away the memories from tonight. And whatever achingly annoying feeling was nagging me at every turn would be gone.

I followed her rules.

I did everything she asked me to do.

Sex with Andi was about as mind-blowing as I could have imagined it would be. So, why did I feel like even though I hardly knew her, something was completely off?

My mind was spinning as I sat in the owner’s suite watching the Neon for their morning skate. If I stayed up here, I’d be alone with my thoughts, which likely wasn’t the best option. So, instead of keeping to myself, I made my way down toward the ice, forcing myself to be somewhat social.

“How’s it going this morning, Coach?” I approached the bench, clapping my best friend on the back.

“Besides JAYSON FUCKING AROUND INSTEAD OF RUNNING DRILLS,” he raised his voice so Jayson and the rest of the team could hear, “all is good. What about you, man?” Even with his eyes focused on the players, I knew I had his attention.

“Slept like shit, but I’m good.”

“That’s funny because you only ever come down here when you need the distraction.” Carter called my bluff.

“Yeah, well, I had a date last night, if you even want to call it that.”

“No shit? Bro, you don’t date, so what the fuck is up?” Carter tore his attention from the ice, nudging my shoulder.

I’d known Carter for quite some time. We played for the Neon years ago, but he was on the team for a bit longer than I was. We both retired early—for different reasons—but remained in the same organization. My path was a bit easier since my dad owned the team already, but Carter had to put in the work, climbing the ladder to claim the title of head coach.

“We got drinks and ended up back at my place. Not really a date.”

“Okay, so you got your dick wet. How is that any different than what you normally do?”

“She, uh … I met her back in Denver briefly. When I went out there for the preseason game.”

“So, what? You’ve been fucking for a while now?” Carter attempted to connect the dots.

I was lost when it came to telling him that for the first time in years, I’d found myself around a girl I couldn’t stop thinking about. It shouldn’t be that hard, but talking about my feelings when it came to women wasn’t easy for me to articulate.

“No. Last night was the first time. And I’m pretty sure the last.”

Andi might think she could bury her feelings, but I saw a lot of myself in her. We were both broken souls who didn’t give our hearts out to just anyone. It was easier to avoid the feelings of it all. But where we were different—I was actually trying to take my therapist’s advice and act on the little flutter I felt in my chest when she was around.

“Damn. Not a good time then?”