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I wince as I’m dragged from the closet by my hair. Muffle my cry when she pulls back and punches me. Doubling over, I clutch at my stomach as I go to my knees.

She walks around me and drives the heel of her shoe into my spine until I fall onto my hands and knees. I try to get away from the stabbing pain, but that only makes her drive it in harder. “You shouldn’t eavesdrop, Lennon. It’s impolite. The least you can do is apologize for being a rude bitch.”

“I’m sorry.” Tears run down my face. Why can’t I be tough like Kelsey? Like Willa was with that man at the club.

She takes her heel from my back. Only to kick me between my legs.

I scream as I fall forward onto my face. Scramble to get back up.

I’m not fast enough. She climbs on top of me. Her knees press into my back. I flail when she grabs for my arms. “Please, Sonatina. Please, I didn’t mean to.”

“Just like you didn’t mean to kill our mother?”

The will to fight deserts me.

“Or like you didn’t mean to sound just like her.” She twists my arms up behind my back. Uses something thin and hard to lash my hands together. Considering her access to the closet, it’s probably a belt.

“I’m sorry.” I sob.

Grabbing my head, she forces something into my mouth. “I don’t want to hear your excuses. I’ve been listening to them all my life. You’re such a waste of space, Lennon.”

Whatever she’s shoved in my mouth is silky and sharp and makes me want to gag. My breaths grow shallow. I don’t want to choke.

“It would have been better if you had died instead of her.”

If I could change the past, I would. If I could die so that she could be here, I would. At least then Sonatina might have been happy. She might even have been nice.

Over and over she kicks me, and I try not to scream. I try to be good, so she’ll stop sooner. So she won’t do worse.

That dress the girls had gotten for me had been so pretty. It had made me feel beautiful. And we’d danced like we didn’t have a care in the world.

I start to hum softly to myself. Inaudibly, so Sonatina won’t hear.

And when Kodiak had let me choose whether I wanted to be kissed or not, I’d felt... different. Valued.

I hold onto these moments—these two good memories—and use them to take me where Sonatina can’t get to me.

Eventually her kicks slow down and stop. She pants heavily as she moves to her vanity and picks something up.

The stench of cigarette smoke sours my stomach. Time slows and my pulse speeds up. Let me be anywhere but here.

She tries to yank down my pants, but they don’t budge over my hanging belly.

“You’re so fat. It’s disgusting.” She gives up on my pants, drags my shirt up, and presses the burning end of the cigarette into my lower back.

I scream as the pain takes over. Blackness blurs the edges of my vision. The stench of my skin burning has bile rising in my throat.

She lifts the cigarette from what I know will be a round scar I’ll carry the rest of my life. Like all the others she has left on me.

“Hmm.” She makes a show of choosing another spot.

God, please let this be over soon. Or if it can’t be. If I deserve this, please just let me pass out and never wake up again.

She presses the end into another spot. Giggles. “I think I’m going to start joining up all your dots. Turn them into one long chain.”

The dark spots grow. They turn everything black.

When I come to... I have no idea how long has passed. But Sonatina is gone and my arms are free. I tug the fabric from my mouth. Some of the sequins have come off and I spit them out. They aren’t all there. I must have swallowed some.