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It is a great honor to be married in this church of Nocturnus. With walls of shiny black obsidian and purple stained glass windows, it protrudes from the snowy landscape like an exotic bird. Its iron spires point their sharp tips to the sky, a violent gesture, some would say, while the thick, knotted base of it digs its roots deep into the ground.

I trace my fingers over the plaque that hangs to the side of the door, the word Nephthys etched in gold. She is the goddess of death. This church was already here when the town of Raven’s Gate was founded. My father is certain that she guards over it.

As I step inside, my anxiety grows. In the front room, there are already too many people for my liking. I feel the air in my lungs constrict even more, and this damn corset is making it impossible to breathe.

My father and brothers greet me. Silas offers a bow while Finnric snickers and pats me on the head like a dog. My parents are too ecstatic to notice. One would think they are more so than I am on my own wedding day. Do they wish to get rid of me that badly?

“My dark angel. You look stunning,” my father gushes. He takes my hands in his, and it nearly brings me to tears. I will never be his little girl again.

“Thank you, Father,” I whisper. I’m a woman now, betrothed to a fully grown man. I will have to lie on my back for him and listen to his anecdotes and laugh at his jokes even when I don’t find them funny.

“Oh, Kana, my darling. Do not be afraid. He is quite well. And kind and generous. He will make you happy. I’m sure of it.” He squeezes my hands.

My heart skips. “You think I will fancy him?”

He gives my beaming mother a wink before nodding back at me. “Of course, my angel. I haven’t met him yet, but I’m sure he’s just as our coachman has described.”

A little knot twists in my gut. “What do you mean? Mother said he was at the manor with you three all night.”

My mother looks as puzzled as I am. “That is what I was told would happen. Icarus?”

My father smooths a strand of my mother’s hair. “He arrived late into the night, long after we had taken our leave for the evening. I wanted to be well rested for today.”

A wave of nausea hits me. “What about this morning? Did you not get ready with him or take breakfast together?”

He shakes his head. “No, my child. He rose early, dressed, and insisted on getting to the church first thing so he could pray a while. Seems like a pious and honorable man, if you ask me.”

Damn. No one but the servants has seen him. I can’t even get my father’s read on him before I seal my fate to him forever. “What… if he’s a monster?”

My mother rolls her eyes and tugs on my father’s arm. “Come, Icarus. Please do not indulge your daughter in these dramatic sentiments any longer.”

He chuckles and pats her arm before lifting my veil slightly to cup my chin in his hands. “If your future husband turns out to be a monster, I will slay him myself. Deal?”

I blink back the tears. My father is the only one who can calm me. He always makes everything feel bearable. I will miss him terribly. I nod. “Yes, Father. I accept your terms.”

He laughs and pulls my veil back down. “Good. Now grab hold of your brothers’ arms. I will meet you on the other side of that altar.”

With Silas on my left and the insufferable Finnric on my right, we lock arms and wait for our parents to walk down the aisle. Once my mother is seated in the front pew, my father takes his place at the altar, next to the man with the jet-black hair. Bellamy Erebus.

He wears the bronze mask of Nocturnus, another tradition to honor the death of who we once were. When we both unveil and unmask together, it is a symbol of our rebirth.

I pray to the ravens that I could take just one full breath right now. My heart is hammering. The church is packed, robbing me of even more air as we walk down the center. I don’t recognize most of the people in the back rows. I’m guessing they are mostly initiates with their wives.

As we near the altar, I lock eyes with my brother’s girlfriend, Jessamine. The petite blonde grins back at me, as warm as the sun. I smile back even though she cannot see my face behind the veil. One day, it will be her turn with my brother. I am suddenly envious of them getting to choose each other.

I give my mother a nod as we pass her and arrive at the front. Silas and Finnric hand me off to my father and step back. He guides me up the steps to where my betrothed stands with Astrid Thorn, our priestess. He offers my hands to him now.

My breath hitches the instant our fingers touch. His hands are cold, and quite rough for a nobleman. His grip is firm and steady. Not the makings of a nervous man, but a confident one. This makes me tremble more.

I gaze up at his masked face and have to stifle a whimper. His dark eyes are impossible to read. As if his body is vacant. On instinct, I pull back, but his grip only tightens, holding me in place. The rest of the ceremony is a blur as I drown in the sea of his darkness.

The handfasting ritual snaps me out of my trance. The priestess binds our arms together with a sash made from raven feathers. She winds it around and around, pulling us in closer together.

He towers over me, his shoulders squared and stiff, his entire body rigid. Through the fabric of his velvet suit, I can feel his chest and arms are hard and muscled. As the sash is wound all the way up to our shoulders, we are brought chest to chest. His gaze flickers down for the briefest of moments as my breasts nearly topple out of my corset when they bump against him. But he quickly locks onto my eyes again.

The priestess lays her hands on my back. “Repeat my words, Arkana.”

My head buzzes, the energy around us pulsing so hard and fast it’s as if the entire church has been swept away with everyone in it except for him and me. “I, Arkana Graves, submit to this union. I swear, as a daughter of Nocturnus, to serve you and only you, my husband. I pledge my loyalty and my will. With this binding, I give you my heart, my soul, my essence, and my womb. Mors tua, vita mea.” Your death, my life.